prolog
It must have been hard for you, who was not comforted.

Part 1 You must have had a hard time
Why don't you understand my heart?
People who say they are lonelier than before marriage
Love unexpressed is indifference
When I see my husband, I see my wife.
The couple looks in different directions
Why I Want to Be Loved from Cradle to Grave
Living in patience is not a skill
The Science of Emotions - Do You Know About the Love Hormone?

Part 2: The moment your husband takes your side, the conflict begins.
There is no husband who is filial alone.
Marriage is a shift in priorities
There are stages to marital conflict.
The problem is always the negative way of talking.
A husband who is good on the outside but silent on the inside
A fight between a couple is a fight between a 'man' and a 'wife'.
Conflict is not the end of love
The Science of Emotions: How Do Male and Female Brains Differ?

Part 3: Focus on the problem and you'll see the solution.
The illusion that I am enduring more
The wife attacks and the husband runs away.
Infidelity is a greater wound than the death of a parent.
Betrayal leaves a spouse vulnerable.
Still, the relationship can be restored.
The moment you say "enough is enough," love ends.
The Science of Emotion: Mirror Neurons and Empathy

Part 4 I love you with my heart
Let go of the illusion that you know everything.
Soothing emotions can revive a couple's love.
Men do, women feel
If you know the heart, the relationship will be resolved.
Everyone has wounds
Couples can grow together
A couple's problems are a family's problems.
Emotions determine the depth of conversation.
Self-esteem is difficult to restore through one's own efforts.
The Science of Emotions: The Power of Emotions to Overcome Crisis

Part 5: 7 Rules for Rebuilding Marriage Love
No one gets married when they are mature.
I believe that people definitely change.
Men also need to become accustomed to emotions.
Don't assume you know without me telling you.
Use attachment-inducing conversation techniques.
Approach and Respond
Be on your spouse's side
The Science of Emotions: The Medicine Called Love

Part 6 When Couples Live, Families Live
The family has changed
When a couple changes, the family comes alive.
For whom is this family life?
Guidelines that make families unhappy
Let's put home in house
The Science of Emotions: The Science of Blame and Avoidance

Epilogue
I'm glad I can confirm and send my husband's love.

Don't continue a lonely and hurtful marriage any longer.
Couples can definitely get better

It's still cold in Seok-gi's house today.
It all started a few days ago when we had an argument over a ancestral rite.
From then on, when my husband got home from work, he would go into his room without saying a word.
The frustrated wife, Hee-young, knocks on the door to ask to talk to her husband, but he remains silent.
A husband has his own things to say.
I can't talk to my wife at all.
It would be nice to talk calmly, but my wife always gets angry.
So I had no choice but to run away.

Problems always start from something trivial like this.
But if this piles up, it can lead to serious and irreversible problems.
In the past, even if there was a lot of conflict between couples, they were told to endure it for the sake of the children.
However, there are also research results that show that all members of a family experiencing marital conflict suffer from depression, and that a child's emotional intelligence varies depending on the emotional bond between the parents.
This is evidence that marital conflict can have a negative impact not only on the couple but also on their children.
So, the advice that we must endure for the sake of our children can no longer be the advice that sustains our families.

Personality differences are emotional differences
The causes may be different, such as infidelity, finances, childcare, or in-laws' problems.
The real problem is something else

According to the Judicial Yearbook published by the Supreme Court, 47% of the reasons for divorce in Korea are differences in personality.
It is said that one in two couples get divorced because of their different personalities, which causes them to feel emotionally disconnected from each other.
Author Park Seong-deok, who has counseled over 2,000 couples for 16 years, says that personality differences ultimately arise from a lack of understanding of each other's emotions.
Since personality is the outward expression of emotions, in order to overcome personality differences, you must first understand your spouse's emotions.
He adds that most problems that arise between couples can be solved simply by understanding emotions.
As the first doctor to introduce emotion-centered couples counseling in Korea, he also suggests very scientific and easy ways to understand emotions.

"Focusing on a couple's emotions will solve other problems."
7 Key Ways to Understand Your Couple's Emotions

In this book, the author presents seven ways to understand your spouse's emotions.
It is the result of a culmination of psychological research and counseling know-how, including the need for intimacy, attachment theory, and the problem of psychological wounds.
Even if you just follow these simple steps at home, you will experience a surprising change in your marital relationship.

1.
I know that no one gets married when they are mature.
Many people think that they become a couple just by having a wedding, but the true birth of a couple is an 'emotional union'.
To achieve emotional bonding, 'understanding' must be the foundation.
Understanding begins with an attitude of embracing the other person's shortcomings.
Understanding begins with acknowledging that your spouse is also a normal human being and needs time to adjust to the changes brought on by marriage.
Therefore, simply knowing that no one gets married when they are mature can lay the foundation for 'understanding'.

2.
It takes longer for a man to become a 'husband' than for a woman to become a 'wife'.
Typically, women become aware of their role as wives as soon as they get married, but it takes a long time for men to become aware of their role as husbands.
So, there are many cases where people try to continue their pre-marital life even after marriage.
Husbands who prioritize friends, hobbies, and drinking over family are usually 'men who haven't become husbands yet.'
Many conflicts that arise after marriage arise because of this.
Therefore, the key is to reduce the time gap between becoming husband and wife.
We need time to recognize each other's roles through ongoing dialogue.

3.
Men do, women feel! Let's close that gap.
In many cases, men and women have different ways of expressing their emotions.
Men do things, women feel things. That is, when a problem arises, men try to do things to solve the problem, while women want to receive empathy first.
For example, when his wife is sick, the husband silently washes the dishes to help her, but what the wife wants more than the dishes is a word of sympathy, “You don’t hurt much.”
Just knowing this difference can help reduce unnecessary conflict.

4.
Don't assume you know without me telling you.
There is no telepathy between couples.
It is taboo to think that since you are a married couple, you will understand even if you do not say anything.
Because we are a couple, we need to express ourselves more.
Emotions are conveyed through expression.
Let's be more proactive in expressing ourselves so that positive emotions can be conveyed.

5.
Use attachment-inducing conversation techniques.
To express yourself well, you must learn good conversation skills.
Although conversation isn't the main driver of relationship change, it's a valuable tool for restoring intimacy.
There are three representative methods.
It's about reflecting, acknowledging, and empathizing.
Reflection is being a mirror for your spouse, recognition is acknowledging the other person's feelings as they are, and empathy is recognizing the other person's sincerity through reflection and recognition.
The author says that if you continue to reflect and acknowledge, new emotional circuits will be created in your head, which can reduce marital conflict.
This book details how to reflect, acknowledge, and empathize.

6.
Approach and Respond
To glue paper to paper, you need glue.
There are things that are necessary for people to become close and build relationships.
It's about approach and response.
A good relationship is formed when two people are emotionally honest and responsive to each other.

7.
Shift your priorities
Marriage is a process of shifting priorities.
It is a rebirth from someone's son and someone's daughter into a couple.
Therefore, all priorities should be the couple.
I'm not saying you should be unfilial.
Relationships have priorities.
First, you must strengthen your marital relationship to be able to be filial and raise your children properly.
You need to put your energy into your relationship before you put it into anything else.