A teacher's gift to parents struggling to raise a child who is a little different.
Parents' good standards and energy come first.


Parents' love for their children and the devotion they show to raising them are special.
We spare no effort and pour all our resources into a child who needs special support.
He puts his whole life and household finances on the line to give his child the best he can.
However, the best efforts do not necessarily lead to good results or fruitful outcomes.
Parents' poor information and wavering minds make them deaf and swayed.
There are people who use this.


For children who need special support, cooperation between home and school is even more important, and while it may seem natural, in reality, this is a pipe dream.
Because everyday communication is not sufficient.
This is because it is difficult for parents to see the school and classroom situations and their children's appearance, and it is difficult for teachers to see the home situations and their children's and parents' appearance.
Parenting and education require a child-centered approach, with parents and teachers closely observing each other at home and at school, maintaining common goals and attitudes, and encouraging challenges with consistent, positive messages. Is such collaboration impossible? If so, where should we begin?

Teachers spend the most time with children after parents.
The authors, who are teachers, have been meeting children and parents of the same age for over ten years, and have encountered similar problems, concerns, needs, and demands of parents.
Although each family and each parent has different circumstances, conditions, and thoughts, what is needed for a child's growth and development is similar.
However, honest and open communication between teachers and parents was not as easy as expected.
Finding common ground together is slow, difficult, and often times missed, so the damage ends up being passed on to the child.
Appropriate help and support is delayed.


This book begins with the intention of first starting this conversation, which is difficult to have individually in words, in a book.
It focuses solely on the growth and education of children, and provides parents with the information and key points they need at each stage.
In that sense, this book is a gift to parents raising children who need a little special support and education.


This book is a process of finding the standards for that conversation and education.
This is a process of opening up conversations through stories that elementary, middle, and high school teachers want to tell parents for their children, stories they want to share together, and stories that encourage parents to become more actively involved in their children's education.
I hope this book will serve as a starting point for greater communication, trust, and cooperation between home and school.


This book will be a source of nourishment for parents who struggle to devote all their time and effort solely to their children.
It will serve as a good guide to reduce parents' trial and error, prepare for the long term, and raise children to become active members of society.

No matter what choice is made, parents' hearts are always in pain.
I wish you would tell me that my choice was right… .
No one takes responsibility for my child and my problems.

--- p.28

The world knows too little about developmental disabilities.
We adults have probably played a big part in making the world ignorant about developmental disabilities.
It is also the fault of parents and teachers who tightly wrap and protect their children so that they do not get hurt in the world.
Unfortunately, teachers and parents must work together to teach children and teach them about the world.
After all, this world is where children must live together.

--- p.34

There is something we need to know.
There are no mirrors on the recital stage.
Children do not see themselves.
Don't even compare yourself to your friend next to you.
Children who have not yet developed the ability to compare themselves will show pride in themselves when you praise them by saying, "Well done, well done."

--- p.53

The way parents treat others is the way other people treat their children.
A child's values ​​are no different from the values ​​with which their parents perceive the world and others.
I want my children to feel respected no matter where or what they do.

--- p.64)
Many people invest heavily in their children's Korean language education before they enter regular elementary school.
However, in regular schools, self-help skills are more important than reading and writing Korean.
Sitting ability is also important.
In recent times, the presence or absence of aggressive behavior has become a very important criterion.

--- p.114

For children, school is the first huge society they encounter.
There, children encounter boundaries between themselves and others, form relationships, and grow.
Growing up is always accompanied by growing pains.
Children grow up protecting themselves and interacting with others while going through labor pains.

--- p.121

I think that 1/3 of the time our child will be uncomfortable, 1/3 of the time it will be normal, and the remaining 1/3 of the time we will quietly support our child and watch over them with warm eyes.

--- p.145

Middle school and high school are definitely a transitional period towards becoming a twenty-year-old adult.
How a child navigates this transition period has a significant impact on his or her social life and ability to live independently.
If parents do not consider this transition together, their children will not feel or learn to do things on their own, and will have to live relying on those around them for many things.
It is important to remember that the six years of middle and high school are a precious time for children to prepare for and practice independence.

--- p.192

Because the perception that they can't do something always follows children, many opportunities are blocked or people don't even pay attention to them.
If your opportunities to experience are limited, what you learn along the way is also limited.
If you don't have much experience, you can't feel either failure or success.

--- p.212

There are many delicious restaurants in our area.
But the kids said they had never been to that restaurant.
There were so many restaurants I had never been to in the area for three to ten years.
I wanted to get to know the area where my children lived properly.
I hope that even after graduation, they can enjoy the area they will live in and live happily.

--- p.215

Middle and high school students should think about what to do when a problem arises, make decisions, and find what they need, but the children lacked that kind of attitude.
I had to find the reason and solution for why that was the case.

--- p.224

Children should be able to experience democracy in their daily lives.
Everyone has the right to freedom and equality to express their own opinions, make choices, make decisions, and experience the corresponding responsibilities.
This process must permeate the child's life.

--- p.243

Children have the 'power to think' and the 'power to distinguish between good and bad.'
Believing in the child's power is the starting point.
Children can set their own standards and use them positively.

--- p.262

While the challenges of disability remain a constant part of our physical and mental well-being, there are many other aspects to our lives as well.
Even a son who cannot express himself verbally would not want his family to focus only on him and make sacrifices.
Just as I never want my parents, husband, or children to only look at me.

--- p.281

Whenever I heard the chatter of passersby, I wished that an earthquake would strike and the child and I would disappear into the cracked ground forever.

--- p.285

While I was happy to see my son's test paper with a score of 50 or 60, my children would come to me and brag about their own test papers with 50 or 60 points.
I was also happy to praise the children's progress.
In a society that embraces the weakest, no one is left behind.

--- p.308

Families who have been marginalized by the treatment struggle, which is like an Ironman race, can also accept the unique characteristics of the disability by restoring a normal and flexible relationship with their husband and non-disabled children.

--- p.316

When my son was five or six years old, a neighbor came and said to him,
“There are three things you shouldn’t give to a child like this.
“Fire, knife, string.” As soon as he left, I took out my cutting board and knife.

--- p.317

There is no action without a reason.
The answer to the problem can be found by those closest to the child, right there at the scene of the incident, who can read the child's mind.

--- p.323

Looking at my twenty-five-year-old son, I now dream of perfect love.
It is preparing for a breakup.
Although he may still be mentally like a five or six year old, his body has grown into that of a full-fledged young man. Wouldn't he want to have other women, friends, a curiosity about new society, and his own space and secrets, all within him that he can't express?

--- p.336