You have to know how to shake to avoid breaking.
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Description
Book Introduction
Highly recommended by leading Korean mental health experts including Kim Kyung-il, Kim Joo-hwan, Moon Yo-han, Chae Jeong-ho, and Choi Young-hee!
A psychologist who has studied happiness for 30 years shares tips for wisely coping with life's ups and downs.
“Not just as a psychologist, but as a human being,
“I find myself nodding my head in agreement with the significance of this book’s existence.” (Professor Kim Kyung-il, cognitive psychologist)
We live in a world where the possibility of unhappiness increases with each passing year.
The rapidly changing world is taking away even the simple leisure of an individual, and our hearts, which have lost the leisure to take care of themselves, are becoming increasingly worn out.
What we desperately need is life advice from a seasoned psychologist.
This book contains honest advice from a psychologist who has spent his life studying the human mind and applying that research to his own life.
In his book, author Professor Kim Jeong-ho delivers a clear and concise message.
To be truly free from the trials of life, we must neither resist nor avoid them.
We must bend and twist in the face of trials and become one with life.
We must practice embracing life as it is, shaking with the trials that come our way from time to time.
So how can we cultivate a heart that can be shaken but not broken? The method is all contained in this book.
Psychology is certainly useful for navigating life, but it's difficult to apply its rigid theories to everyday life.
So the author has incorporated the core techniques for controlling the mind into simple, everyday experiences that anyone can relate to.
Let's read it lightly without any burden, sometimes laughing and saying, "That's right, I was like that too," and sometimes shedding tears without holding back the comfort that understands our hearts.
Your heart, which was always heavy, will soon become clear and free of shadows.
A psychologist who has studied happiness for 30 years shares tips for wisely coping with life's ups and downs.
“Not just as a psychologist, but as a human being,
“I find myself nodding my head in agreement with the significance of this book’s existence.” (Professor Kim Kyung-il, cognitive psychologist)
We live in a world where the possibility of unhappiness increases with each passing year.
The rapidly changing world is taking away even the simple leisure of an individual, and our hearts, which have lost the leisure to take care of themselves, are becoming increasingly worn out.
What we desperately need is life advice from a seasoned psychologist.
This book contains honest advice from a psychologist who has spent his life studying the human mind and applying that research to his own life.
In his book, author Professor Kim Jeong-ho delivers a clear and concise message.
To be truly free from the trials of life, we must neither resist nor avoid them.
We must bend and twist in the face of trials and become one with life.
We must practice embracing life as it is, shaking with the trials that come our way from time to time.
So how can we cultivate a heart that can be shaken but not broken? The method is all contained in this book.
Psychology is certainly useful for navigating life, but it's difficult to apply its rigid theories to everyday life.
So the author has incorporated the core techniques for controlling the mind into simple, everyday experiences that anyone can relate to.
Let's read it lightly without any burden, sometimes laughing and saying, "That's right, I was like that too," and sometimes shedding tears without holding back the comfort that understands our hearts.
Your heart, which was always heavy, will soon become clear and free of shadows.
- You can preview some of the book's contents.
Preview
index
Recommendation
Prologue - You are wiser today than you were yesterday.
Chapter 1: If you hate me, the whole world becomes your enemy.
If you push it out forcefully, it will come back stronger.
The real enemy is within me
Accepting things as they are comes first.
I don't know myself at all
A person cannot be defined in one word.
You have to keep your balance to avoid falling.
Love the day you choose
Chapter 2: Don't try to change what you can't change.
It was always me who hurt me
Just asking good questions can solve problems.
There is an algorithm in the mind too.
Happiness is a choice you make.
As long as I'm happy, that's enough
A life attitude that turns misfortune into good luck
If you find something difficult to do, think about its meaning.
Life becomes easier when you don't have expectations.
Chapter 3: You must know how to shake so you don't break.
Pain only goes away when faced with it.
You only have to win against one person.
If you fall, just get back up.
To eliminate worry, you must stop thinking.
Why the more you have, the more unhappy you become
Loving myself comes first
Chapter 4: Live Lightly, Going with the Flow
Too much of anything can be poisonous.
The temperature of the head is the temperature of the heart.
The mind also needs vitamins
Be kind to others for my sake
Altruism begins with selfishness.
How to Break the Cycle of Hatred
Kindness saves us
Surrender is happiness
To have a last day without regrets
I could be wrong
Closing the Book - The World of Your Mind
Prologue - You are wiser today than you were yesterday.
Chapter 1: If you hate me, the whole world becomes your enemy.
If you push it out forcefully, it will come back stronger.
The real enemy is within me
Accepting things as they are comes first.
I don't know myself at all
A person cannot be defined in one word.
You have to keep your balance to avoid falling.
Love the day you choose
Chapter 2: Don't try to change what you can't change.
It was always me who hurt me
Just asking good questions can solve problems.
There is an algorithm in the mind too.
Happiness is a choice you make.
As long as I'm happy, that's enough
A life attitude that turns misfortune into good luck
If you find something difficult to do, think about its meaning.
Life becomes easier when you don't have expectations.
Chapter 3: You must know how to shake so you don't break.
Pain only goes away when faced with it.
You only have to win against one person.
If you fall, just get back up.
To eliminate worry, you must stop thinking.
Why the more you have, the more unhappy you become
Loving myself comes first
Chapter 4: Live Lightly, Going with the Flow
Too much of anything can be poisonous.
The temperature of the head is the temperature of the heart.
The mind also needs vitamins
Be kind to others for my sake
Altruism begins with selfishness.
How to Break the Cycle of Hatred
Kindness saves us
Surrender is happiness
To have a last day without regrets
I could be wrong
Closing the Book - The World of Your Mind
Detailed image
Into the book
Psychologists find summer psychologically cool.
What this means is that instead of trying to change what I can't change (the weather outside), I'm going to get through the summer by taking better care of what I can control (my mind).
--- p.17
Negative emotions do not disappear by suppressing them.
Suppressed negative emotions don't disappear, but rather hide in a corner of the mind and dream of rebellion.
If you have a cheerful expression when you are with others but feel a wave of depression when you are alone, or if you are usually a good listener but suddenly become angry over trivial things, it is all due to a rebellion of negative emotions.
--- p.36
Does blaming and punishing the car that cuts you off while you're driving make you happier? Or does it make you reflect on the car that cuts you off and avoid cutting you off again? Because we can't see ourselves objectively, we repeat mindsets and actions that perpetuate unhappiness.
If you were to observe this from a third party perspective, what would it look like? It wouldn't seem wise at all.
--- p.42
Who would want to accept a situation that causes them pain or that they dislike?
But if it has already been given, there is no other way but to accept it.
If you don't accept it and resist, the situation will only get worse.
If you break a bowl of water and water splashes on the floor, it is wise to accept the situation and clean up the water.
In this situation, resisting by saying, “Why did you break the bowl?” or “Why are you so rude?” will not change the situation.
The water just spreads wider across the floor.
--- p.77
Black-and-white thinking often combines with perfectionism to create extreme stress.
When perfectionism is added to black-and-white logic, if there is even one mistake or error in the goal state that you are pursuing, even if it is called 'white', it immediately becomes 'black'.
Therefore, people who think in black and white tend to give up immediately if they make even one mistake or fail while working on something.
--- p.147
In psychology, there is a term called the 'mood congruency effect.'
When you're in a good mood, good memories come to mind more easily, and when you're in a bad mood, bad memories come to mind more easily.
When I'm angry at my husband, I tend to think about the things he did wrong and upset me more than the things he did well for me in the past.
Once I get angry, memories of things that made me angry before come flooding back and I get angrier and angrier.
Therefore, it is best to avoid thinking about negative emotions as much as possible.
After regaining composure and reflecting on the problem, you will be able to make much wiser judgments and decisions.
--- p.201
If you truly love all living things, including yourself, you cannot help but feel genuine sorrow for the existential reality of all beings.
Moreover, if we feel true sorrow for the existential reality of all beings, we cannot help but truly love all beings.
In this way, true love contains sorrow for living things, and true sorrow contains love for living things.
What this means is that instead of trying to change what I can't change (the weather outside), I'm going to get through the summer by taking better care of what I can control (my mind).
--- p.17
Negative emotions do not disappear by suppressing them.
Suppressed negative emotions don't disappear, but rather hide in a corner of the mind and dream of rebellion.
If you have a cheerful expression when you are with others but feel a wave of depression when you are alone, or if you are usually a good listener but suddenly become angry over trivial things, it is all due to a rebellion of negative emotions.
--- p.36
Does blaming and punishing the car that cuts you off while you're driving make you happier? Or does it make you reflect on the car that cuts you off and avoid cutting you off again? Because we can't see ourselves objectively, we repeat mindsets and actions that perpetuate unhappiness.
If you were to observe this from a third party perspective, what would it look like? It wouldn't seem wise at all.
--- p.42
Who would want to accept a situation that causes them pain or that they dislike?
But if it has already been given, there is no other way but to accept it.
If you don't accept it and resist, the situation will only get worse.
If you break a bowl of water and water splashes on the floor, it is wise to accept the situation and clean up the water.
In this situation, resisting by saying, “Why did you break the bowl?” or “Why are you so rude?” will not change the situation.
The water just spreads wider across the floor.
--- p.77
Black-and-white thinking often combines with perfectionism to create extreme stress.
When perfectionism is added to black-and-white logic, if there is even one mistake or error in the goal state that you are pursuing, even if it is called 'white', it immediately becomes 'black'.
Therefore, people who think in black and white tend to give up immediately if they make even one mistake or fail while working on something.
--- p.147
In psychology, there is a term called the 'mood congruency effect.'
When you're in a good mood, good memories come to mind more easily, and when you're in a bad mood, bad memories come to mind more easily.
When I'm angry at my husband, I tend to think about the things he did wrong and upset me more than the things he did well for me in the past.
Once I get angry, memories of things that made me angry before come flooding back and I get angrier and angrier.
Therefore, it is best to avoid thinking about negative emotions as much as possible.
After regaining composure and reflecting on the problem, you will be able to make much wiser judgments and decisions.
--- p.201
If you truly love all living things, including yourself, you cannot help but feel genuine sorrow for the existential reality of all beings.
Moreover, if we feel true sorrow for the existential reality of all beings, we cannot help but truly love all beings.
In this way, true love contains sorrow for living things, and true sorrow contains love for living things.
--- p.235
Publisher's Review
The more you shake, the stronger you become, and the more you endure, the weaker you become!
Pine trees, which grow by taking root even on windswept cliffs, are famous for their tenacity.
However, if you look closely at the shape of pine trees, there are many more that are crooked and twisted vertically and horizontally than trees that grow straight.
This is because, in order to avoid breaking, the stem changes direction according to the wind blowing in the place where it has taken root.
So, unlike other trees that only grow straight, pine trees are said to be able to spread their branches and grow widely even in harsh environments.
A pine tree does not give up on growing just because it has been hurt once or twice.
Adapting to the direction of the wind, accepting adversity, and creating your own unique shape with your own spirit.
In this book, the author has easily explained the mindset of living life like a pine tree by incorporating it into everyday experiences.
If you engrave the author's thoughts into your heart one by one, you too will be able to grow into a person like a pine tree that grows resiliently in any environment.
Today's mistakes are definitely better than yesterday's mistakes!
We promise ourselves never to repeat the same mistakes again, yet we keep repeating them over and over again.
You resolve not to get angry at people, but when you see someone do something wrong, you find yourself getting angry again without realizing it. You resolve not to be swayed by other people's opinions, but when you hear rumors about yourself, you prick up your ears and become upset.
But there's no need to scold me too much.
It is human nature to get angry and tense when faced with unexpected situations.
If you look back at yourself like that, reflect on yourself, and promise to do better again, that in itself is progress, and you can praise yourself for that.
That's what growth is.
It is not about changing into a different person overnight, but about realizing and growing little by little each day, and changing the person we are.
Let's cherish the value of small changes and consistently practice the mind training methods contained in this book.
Life will be completely different in one year, in ten years.
The one who torments me the most is myself!
When life gets tough, we easily blame our circumstances and others.
But is all stress really created by external circumstances? The author argues that the person who causes the most suffering in life is actually himself.
Hot summer, high temperatures and humidity make it hard for us.
But is it really just the weather? What makes the heat even more frustrating is my own grumbling and frowning.
The same thing happens when relationships with people close to you deteriorate.
Rather than just blaming his insensitive words and actions, I should also look into my own heart for expecting too much from him.
You need to learn to take a step back from your situation and look at yourself through the eyes of a third party.
When we can step away from the situation we are in and look at our mind and actions objectively, the real solution appears.
In this book, the author guides us through the practice of looking at our minds objectively.
If you follow the author's guidance and make small but consistent changes, you will soon find yourself easily overcoming any hardship.
Pine trees, which grow by taking root even on windswept cliffs, are famous for their tenacity.
However, if you look closely at the shape of pine trees, there are many more that are crooked and twisted vertically and horizontally than trees that grow straight.
This is because, in order to avoid breaking, the stem changes direction according to the wind blowing in the place where it has taken root.
So, unlike other trees that only grow straight, pine trees are said to be able to spread their branches and grow widely even in harsh environments.
A pine tree does not give up on growing just because it has been hurt once or twice.
Adapting to the direction of the wind, accepting adversity, and creating your own unique shape with your own spirit.
In this book, the author has easily explained the mindset of living life like a pine tree by incorporating it into everyday experiences.
If you engrave the author's thoughts into your heart one by one, you too will be able to grow into a person like a pine tree that grows resiliently in any environment.
Today's mistakes are definitely better than yesterday's mistakes!
We promise ourselves never to repeat the same mistakes again, yet we keep repeating them over and over again.
You resolve not to get angry at people, but when you see someone do something wrong, you find yourself getting angry again without realizing it. You resolve not to be swayed by other people's opinions, but when you hear rumors about yourself, you prick up your ears and become upset.
But there's no need to scold me too much.
It is human nature to get angry and tense when faced with unexpected situations.
If you look back at yourself like that, reflect on yourself, and promise to do better again, that in itself is progress, and you can praise yourself for that.
That's what growth is.
It is not about changing into a different person overnight, but about realizing and growing little by little each day, and changing the person we are.
Let's cherish the value of small changes and consistently practice the mind training methods contained in this book.
Life will be completely different in one year, in ten years.
The one who torments me the most is myself!
When life gets tough, we easily blame our circumstances and others.
But is all stress really created by external circumstances? The author argues that the person who causes the most suffering in life is actually himself.
Hot summer, high temperatures and humidity make it hard for us.
But is it really just the weather? What makes the heat even more frustrating is my own grumbling and frowning.
The same thing happens when relationships with people close to you deteriorate.
Rather than just blaming his insensitive words and actions, I should also look into my own heart for expecting too much from him.
You need to learn to take a step back from your situation and look at yourself through the eyes of a third party.
When we can step away from the situation we are in and look at our mind and actions objectively, the real solution appears.
In this book, the author guides us through the practice of looking at our minds objectively.
If you follow the author's guidance and make small but consistent changes, you will soon find yourself easily overcoming any hardship.
GOODS SPECIFICS
- Date of issue: September 4, 2023
- Page count, weight, size: 264 pages | 292g | 128*188*17mm
- ISBN13: 9791191731538
- ISBN10: 1191731537
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