· Opening remarks | 'You' who have suffered so much, who among us is not 'you'?

Part 1.
Parents, but...
How could I have done that as a parent?

-What kind of beings are parents that they are in so much pain?
-It's okay to hate your parents.
-Not all parents are 'parent-like'
-Say 'I hated you'.
Confess that it was 'too hard'
-I understand, but I may not forgive you.
-Keep your distance.
Don't try too hard to do well
-If we separate them from their parents and study them as different entities,
-Why do parents only remember the good things they did for them, and children only remember the bad things they did for them?
-It was a love that caused pain the more I loved it.

Part 2.
So, I...
It's not your fault, you couldn't help it then.

-I hate my parents, but underneath that hate is a bigger one.
-I can't even make small decisions on my own.
-I just endure and tolerate nonsense
-When I think that it's something my parents want me to do, I don't want to do it.
-I keep meeting bad guys.
-I can't say 'No'.
I have a hard time with interpersonal relationships
-There's no time to love because of the countless 'musts'
-The parent who hit me, me hitting the child
-People at work are bullying me.
The company just looks after me
-I have sexual obsession.
I'm worried about my child's sex education.
- Parents who ignore their children who didn't graduate from college
-When things get too hard, I think, 'I wish I could just die.'
-I keep having regrets about countless little things in my daily life.
-I feel abandoned even if I'm not understood even a little.
-Can I reconcile myself with my inner pain, its devastation?

Part 3.
But then again, parents...
Don't be afraid, your child is different from you.

-You don't want to be a mother like my mother
-The child will never grow up to be like you.
Don't be afraid
Why are you so sorry? Guilt isn't maternal love.
-Discipline is necessary.
But don't be scared
-I feel like my child really can't do what I want.
-The child who didn't act like a child was actually sick.
-It's always the parents who have to reach out again
-Don't be so desperate about parenting, it's okay.
-Don't take the child's feelings for granted.
-To develop self-confidence in your child
-Ultimately, 'warm memories with parents' are the most important.
-If the desire to raise a child well becomes too strong, 'my greed' will appear in it.

Part 4.
And again, I...
If you know where pain begins, you should also know where happiness comes.

-My inner self and I joining hands is 'reconciliation'.
-Talk to me and say, “Is this something to be so sad about?”
-Acknowledge the wounds I have received, the desires within me, and accept myself.
-Don't be so distressed that the foundation of my life is shaken.
-'Ah, here I go again, beware!' You have to shout to yourself.
-As long as you're not bothered, it's okay the way it is now.
-You're a good person, but not everyone likes you.
-Avoiding things you hate more than dying is also a wise way to live.
-There's a good chance that the path I'm on now is the best.
-I just do my best with what's given to me today.

· Closing Remarks | Forgive Me Every Night Before You Go to Bed

We don't know ourselves, we get lost every day.
We fall often, perhaps even daily.
Sometimes, even the smallest of moments can cause uncontrollable pain or anger to well up within us.
But was that situation really so sad, so infuriating? What shook the very foundations of my heart so violently? Why did you feel so hurt at that moment? Why do similar problems keep recurring in different environments? What triggers these uncontrollable emotional outbursts?

This book deals with long-standing pains that we were unaware of, or perhaps wanted to ignore.
It tells us to face the wound that hurts even if we just brush past it.
So, as you read this book, you may come face to face with old wounds within you, or discover patterns in your thoughts or behavior that you were not aware of.
The reason we look at that pain is because it is the beginning of the ultimate solution to the problem.

Of course, this book clearly shows you how to get back up after every crisis, but the important point to keep in mind before that is that you must have the courage to face yourself.

You're okay, you're okay enough
"Why am I like this?" "That's just how I am." We often live our lives so consumed by self-reflection and self-reproach that we forget the value and dignity of our own existence.
But you, we, we are all worthy beings.
Becoming an adult is a process of getting to know myself.
But why do we push ourselves so hard instead of getting to know ourselves? Why do we treat ourselves so harshly?

Dr. Eunyoung Oh, a psychiatrist, is well known as the 'national parenting mentor.'
The reason Dr. Oh Eun-young has so emphasized the role of parents and proper parenting is because, as a child and adolescent psychiatrist and psychiatrist, she has encountered and looked into countless cases of pain and discovered countless times that the root of pain lies in unresolved wounds toward parents.
And this is because those who become adults without resolving that wound spend their entire lives looking at themselves through the wrong lens they received from their parents.


The more you think about hating each other, the more guilt you feel in the parent-child relationship. Healing begins with looking at the wounded 'me' of my childhood as it was.
Only then can I gain the courage to overcome the pain, crisis, and problems I am facing now.
Only then can I reassure myself that I am okay now.


A time to reconcile with your inner self: "Searching for Myself"
Parents are the mirror of their children.
Children create a window through which they view themselves and the world through their parents.
If you have a wrong perspective on the world due to the wrong window in your childhood, you will have problems with your 'sociality' in looking at others, your 'values' in looking at the world, and your 'self-esteem' in looking at yourself.

I'm not saying you should blame your parents for giving you the wrong perspective.
Remember, it's not my fault.
We are no longer children who could do nothing but get soaked in the pouring rain.
Now everything has changed so much that you can create your own windows.
You, who opened this book because you wanted to know yourself better, and you, who are looking back on your wounded self, are proof that you already have the strength to do so.
This book encourages you to believe in that power and take a step forward.

There is homework to be done before creating a healthy window.
It is the 'me' who is crying because of being hurt and the 'me' who hated that kind of self reconciling.
Reconciliation begins when I forgive myself and join hands with my inner self.
This book helps you discover yourself through numerous counseling cases, empathize with yourself, and create a new window to find your true self.