Sometimes you have to be intensely lonely

The more people think they are doing well, the more broken they are.
I've met almost all the successful people in Korea.
Most of them are not normal.
I'm the only one who doesn't know.
Let's think about it logically.
How much madness must they have lived to reach that position? How much gritted teeth must they have endured? How many competitors must they have trampled upon to reach that position? Yet, they don't realize that their bodies and minds are in terrible condition.
Everyone around me knows.
He just doesn't say anything because of the money and power he has.
And then everyone gets sucked into one room.
--- p.6

In fact, loneliness is quite natural in Japan.
Even though an older international student in his fifties came here to study art, he doesn't feel uncomfortable at all even though he eats and moves around alone in a one-room apartment.
There is absolutely no need to feel embarrassed eating alone at a restaurant.
What about Korea? Korea's aging rate is also among the fastest in the world.
However, in Korea, ‘loneliness’ is still an unfamiliar word.
Because you shouldn't be lonely.
In our culture, loneliness is simply a hallmark of a failed life.
That's why, while you're still healthy, you run around to other people's weddings and funerals, thinking you're going to die.
Because I absolutely cannot stand to look lonely on my wedding day.
--- p.22

I often feel anxious when I'm alone.
This is especially true when living abroad.
I've been studying psychology for over 30 years, but there doesn't seem to be a magic psychological solution for my particular midlife anxiety.
Japanese housewives work really hard to make their beds.
When I thought the sunlight was really nice and opened the window, I saw blankets hanging on the windows of every house.
I also hung up the blanket.
When I come home from school in the evening after drawing all afternoon, I feel so good when there's a blanket hanging on the windowsill of my house.
Because it feels like someone is waiting for me.
When I cover myself with that 'pitter-patter' blanket at night, my heart feels warm.
I can bear sleeping alone.
--- p.48

We can't start the new year with anger and resentment.
It would be too much to hope that this year will start off well.
The alternative to anger is gratitude and appreciation.
The most beautiful emotion that humans have is 'longing'.
The etymology of writing, painting, and longing is the same.
If you draw it on paper, it becomes a picture, and if you draw it in your heart, it becomes a longing.
Gratitude and gratitude are the methods of longing.
Only when you have thankful and grateful memories can you feel longing.
This year should be one in which we seek out the memories of gratitude that are missing from the collective memory of Koreans, which is devastated and fragmented by anger and resentment.
--- p.40

You need to think very seriously about the other life you will start after retirement.
I can't just sit around and grow old, receiving a meager pension.
It's so hard for everyone to try to live to 100 with values ​​created in an era where the average life expectancy was 50 years.
The younger generation, who will live for 100 years, are becoming more anxious because they are being forced to live an average life expectancy of 50 years.
If we have the wisdom to see the forest with a warm heart, both individuals and nations will be at ease.
--- p.68

There are roughly three ways to change the Gestalt, or context, of life.
First, it is about changing ‘people’.
You shouldn't always meet the same people and tell the same stories over and over again.
Second, the ‘location’ must be changed.
When places change, thoughts and attitudes also change.
After living in Japan for a few years, I can tell you that it really is like that.
Finally, it is about changing your ‘interest’.
When you become interested in a world you knew nothing about, you start studying it.
There is nothing more joyful than discovering and experiencing something new.
Of these three, changing your focus is the most important.
Because when interests change, people change and places in life change.
--- p.103

The reason my life hasn't been happy at all in the past few years is because it's been going too fast.
The story is that the pace of my life, which I could not handle at all, made me sad and depressed.
I always had to speak quickly, and I would get annoyed and interrupt others when they thought or spoke slowly.
He got very angry at the slow work of teaching assistants and students.
He was often late for classes, meetings, and appointments, and always left early, saying he was busy.
But in a corner of Kyoto where no one came looking for me, my life finally returned to normal.

--- p.330