65 home management solutions from a professional home and marital relationship coach!

Korea's first couples instructors and professional coaches specializing in family and marital relationships, Doo Sang-dal, chairman of the Family Culture Center, and Kim Young-sook, director of the Family Culture Center, are 'evangelists of family happiness' who have been promoting healthy family movements for decades.
Having worked as a business manager and a pharmacist respectively, they themselves had once gone through a difficult time due to marital conflict, so they were better able to understand and help those experiencing marital conflict than anyone else.


“My husband was taken aback by my crying.
Until then, my husband had no understanding of my suffering as a woman.
But once my husband realized we had a problem, he started listening to my voice.
I also opened my heart to that change.
Now that I think about it, I feel really sorry for my husband.
My husband never gave me anything I wanted.
“He was stingy with encouragement and praise, and was always full of discouraging remarks and nagging.” (From ‘Epilogue’)

This book, which is based on the authors' own experiences of marital conflict and recovery, and which has been a long-standing source of couples relationship coaching and counseling cases, has been newly published in a revised and expanded edition after 17 years.
This revised and expanded edition is particularly notable for its addition of a chapter on "Sexual Life for Couples," which contains specific advice and suggestions for a healthy and happy sex life for couples.

Even I, who call myself a missionary of family happiness, have regrets and regrets about not being able to do my part at home.
There are times when my heart aches and hurts with regret, thinking, ‘If only I had known the principles of family earlier, I would have been a better husband and father…’
As a father, I was clumsy and immature, so I sometimes hurt others unintentionally, and I lived as an imaginary father and an indifferent husband.
So, I too was once an 'unlicensed head of household' who was more dysfunctional than functional at home.
(…)
"A Morning Kiss Increases Your Salary" is a collection of stories from my life as a former 'unlicensed married person' and from my family's life, as well as cases from meeting and counseling countless couples.
Not everyone can be number one, but everyone can be happy.
You can't change the past, but you can change the future and live happily.
This book will be a comfort to those who are struggling with family problems and suffering from heartache.
I look forward to approaching you with hope.
I am also confident that this will be a sound and beneficial guide and a gateway to happiness for all those who dream of a happy and blessed married life.
--- p.8, from “Prologue”

Even when I wear new shoes, I still get blisters and scratches.
How could there be no pain and conflict when two completely different people meet and form a family?
If there is joy in living together, there is bound to be pain and suffering in living together at the same time.
Without pain and suffering, there can be no joy.
That is why a married couple is called a 'companion' who shares joys and sorrows.
The couple is not a princess and prince from a fairy tale.
It is a scene of life where we live in reality.
The problem is that I want the other person to be a princess while I am not ready to be a prince.
--- p.27~28, from “Marriage is Reality”

The problem is unprepared marriage.
They only prepared for the 'wedding ceremony' but not for 'marriage'.
What you need to prepare for a happy family is not the wedding, but marriage.
A true marriage should be accompanied by a spiritual dowry, not a material one.
We must learn the principles of marriage, the correct view of marriage, the differences between men and women, communication skills, conflict resolution, the roles of a couple, a beautiful sex life, and the wisdom to live together as one for a lifetime as two different people.
--- p.39~40, from “Marriage also requires a license”

Apartment sizes are increasing, but families are becoming sick from within, and while wedding costs are rising, the divorce rate is also rising.
To build a happy family, you must have sufficient knowledge about the principles of marriage and family.
We must break free from vague fantasies and expectations, accept marriage as a reality, and learn the wisdom to deal with conflict.

Marriage is not about two 100-point people meeting to make 200 points.
Marriage is when two people, both lacking and imperfect, meet and move towards 100-200 points.
That process is the path to happiness.
Happiness lies in those who recognize and accept their own shortcomings and are content with them.
--- p.42, from “Marriage also requires a license”

Since she failed the fourth time, how could she not have known that she would have to retake the exam to get her driver's license? What she needed wasn't a solution, but a warm consolation from her husband.
“You must have been really upset.
That test tube is really bad.
“Please take good care of my wife.”
What a sense to say something like that! I, too, lacked sense.
Then men will immediately start asking questions like this.
“No, but will you give me a license for that?”
Of course, it doesn't mean you'll be given a license.
But with just warm comfort and enough empathy, women can release their pent-up emotions and gain new strength to challenge themselves again.
--- p.91, from “Empathy Comes Before Answers”

It is said that 90 percent of the causes of fights between couples are things that happened in the past, and only 10 percent are things that happen in the present.
So, many couples are clinging to the empty shadows of the past, struggling in the present, and driving the future into unhappiness.
…
Even a heinous crime like murder has a statute of limitations of 15 years.
What could possibly be the point of a couple living together for 20 or 30 years, fighting and worrying until they've recouped their losses? The statute of limitations for marital disputes is 24 hours, and if it goes on longer than that, the case is closed due to the expiration of the statute of limitations.
--- p.139, from “Don’t Obsess Over the Past”

· Don't attack people, just fight about the problem.
· Don't bring up the past; talk only about the present and immediate problems.
· Physical violence is a crime.
· Admit your mistakes without arguing or making excuses.
· Don't fight in front of your children.
· Fight in the ring
· Dress up and fight
· Call time out when emotions are running high.
· Use polite language
--- p.158~163, from “Appendix: 20 Rules for Fighting Between Couples”

If a couple wants to enjoy a happy relationship, they must maintain an intimate relationship on a daily basis.
Intimacy outside of bed leads to a fantastic bonding in bed.
If you forcefully demand sex when you are deeply hurt or angry, a happy sex life will become more distant and difficult.
For women, for whom emotional preparation is more important than physical preparation in sex, a husband's coercive demands are close to rape.
Women are sensitive and delicate beings.
If a man's emotions are like a thick rope, a woman's emotions are like a spider's web, shaking even at a single raindrop.
To open a woman's body, you must first open your heart.
This means that foreplay to achieve sexual arousal should always take place in daily life, not just in bed.
--- p.203~204, from “Conditions for a Happy Sex Life”

To pump water, you must first pour a bucket of water into the pump.
This is called a welcome gift.
As I change, my family changes.

This book is just a small picture book that carefully describes those fruits.
Those who have not tasted the fruit of happiness will never understand its taste, no matter how much it is explained to them.
If this book, which records the small, everyday experiences that everyone experiences at home, can be of help to all couples who wish to live a happy life, what more could we ask for?

--- p.279, from "Epilogue"