Introduction - The starting point of all negotiations is oneself.

PART 1: THE THINGS WE MISS
Lesson 1: People Who Undervalue Themselves
Why focus solely on "negative" information? What stories do you tell yourself? The trap of the low Maginot Line: The less you expect, the less you get? Two babysitters and the trap of unpaid labor? Negotiation and moral frameworks? The choice is ours.
Lesson 2: People Obsessed with Others' Gaze
"I didn't want to make people uncomfortable"? The pitfalls of an unconditional "yes"? The potential danger of being a good person is anger? Why a "good no" is so much better than a "bad yes"? Don't be uncomfortable with silence? You can't please everyone.
Lesson 3: Why We're Dragged by Wounds
Negotiation isn't a fight? People who don't know how to ask for help? People who can't escape survival mode? The scars of an economic crisis.
Lesson 4: The 'method' of suggestion is also important. Sometimes it takes time. Don't force yourself to wear clothes that don't fit. Gender matters.
Don't say yes, but empathy is important? Business is also a people thing. The problem with overconfidence? Go beyond yes.

PART 2 HOW TO MOVE HEART
Lesson 5: The Power of an Open Attitude
Examine your own desires? Confront your biases? Choose curiosity over certainty? Know everything because you're family? My perspective, your perspective.
Lesson 6: The Power of Empathy
Who should be the most empathetic? Even empathy requires moderation. Negotiation involves giving in where it counts.
Lesson 7: The Power of Focusing on the Here and Now
People who can't get away from their phones? The illusion of transparency? Listening wholeheartedly? Managing emotions.
Lesson 8: Assume Abundance
The Perspective of Abundance vs.
From a scarcity perspective? An ethical issue? To share information or not? Overcome fear with an abundance perspective? Don't limit yourself.
Lesson 9: Believe in Your Strengths
Is being different a strength? Storytelling and persuasion? Compete with exceptional problem-solving skills? Authenticity is stronger than prejudice? The power of experience? Prepare thoroughly? The importance of likability? Does pretending to be powerful actually make you powerful? Dealing with villains
Lesson 10: Finding Connections with Others
Understanding others' experiences? Managing emotions in political conversations? Understanding through explanation? The power of storytelling? Keep talking: Moving beyond argument to understanding? Seeing hope in positive change.

Acknowledgements
References

Wharton School's exceptional negotiation class, winner of six Best Education Awards

Top Negotiation Professor Meets 5,000 Entrepreneurs
“How did they move hearts and get what they wanted?”

★ The latest negotiation theory from a negotiation consultant specializing in Fortune 100 companies.
★ Recommended by John Rogers, Chairman of the Goldman Sachs Foundation
★ Includes numerous Wharton School practical mock negotiation cases.

Victory or defeat depends on understanding your own worth.
A bold but realistic negotiation class

Professor Mori Taherifour has taught negotiation classes to Wharton School undergraduate and graduate students, leading American small business owners, real estate investment consultants, and major league athletes.
He always meets people with puzzled looks asking him questions during the first class.

“How can being honest about your feelings be advantageous in negotiations?”
“How can I dominate a conversation without hiding my introverted tendencies?”
“What does knowing yourself have to do with negotiation?”
“I’m sorry, but isn’t this a negotiation class, not a psychotherapy class?”

Mori Taheripore does not talk about the flashy conversational skills or logical strategies to subdue the opponent that are emphasized in conventional negotiation theory.
There is no psychological pressure to appear extroverted and strong.
Instead, he constantly advises us to focus fully on our true selves and to be open about the vulnerabilities we wish to hide.
People question his unique approach to negotiation, which states that "real negotiation begins with understanding oneself, not others." However, after experiencing his first mock negotiation, he soon realizes that his doubts were wrong and that this is why he has always failed to move the hearts of others.


A person who is 'actually' competitive and unwavering in his logic
vs.

A person who wears a 'mask' to hide their introverted personality
-Who got the result they wanted?

Classes always begin with a mock negotiation, timed to 30 minutes.
In the first class, a mock negotiation was held between a contractor remodeling the president's office and the landlord who hired him.
The homeowner is very dissatisfied because the contractor has repeatedly missed his deadlines.
There was even a situation where the construction was done with tiles that were completely different from the ones chosen by the homeowner.
The landlord likes the new tiles, but says he will reduce the cost of the work by 50 percent because he broke his promise.
Brett, a confident and assertive financial worker, plays the role of a construction worker, while Angela, a quiet, kind-hearted woman who works well with her friends, plays the role of a homeowner.
Who will win the negotiations between these two?

In fact, Brett and Angela's negotiations broke down after just 10 minutes.
The two men felt that they could not find a solution unless one side gave in completely, and decided to resort to legal action as a last resort.
To avoid appearing easy in the negotiations, Angela pressed Brett in an unusually firm and demanding tone.
She was so busy hiding her true personality that she lost her judgment and attention, making it difficult for her to respond nimbly to the flow of the conversation, and the negotiations became unproductive.
How would the conversation have unfolded if Angela, true to her gentle and tolerant nature, had offered Brett a compromise? Wouldn't it have been Angela's "aggressive stance" to win that so strongly fueled Brett's competitive spirit?

The Real Reason Why I Couldn't Move My Opponent's Heart
Pay attention to the power of 'empathy and connection' that turns failure into success!

More than any other strategy, ‘understanding your own value’ is the most important foundation and starting point of negotiation.
No matter how good you are at numbers and logic, you will never gain an advantage if you don't understand yourself properly.
For example, if you're about to negotiate your salary and don't know your strengths and weaknesses, how can you possibly offer the terms you want and find a satisfactory compromise?
Furthermore, Mori Taheripore emphasizes the power of ‘empathy and connection.’
Negotiation is a conversation between people.
It is a series of processes to find common ground.
If you lack the ability to truly understand the other person's perspective and fail to build positive rapport through dialogue, how can you possibly succeed in negotiation? Focusing on empathy and relationship building is essential to winning hearts.
The difference between those who recognize this and act on it and those who do not is stark.


You might still think people who open up to others and build bonds are naive, but the 5,000 entrepreneurs Mori Taheripore met in the field clearly show that this is a misconception.
They avoided unnecessary power struggles with others, built trust and reputation, and eventually got what they wanted.
Rather than focusing on immediate profits, we did not miss out on the various values ​​created within relationships.
They practiced effectively expressing their emotions, asking questions, avoiding hasty judgments, finding common ground, and mastering their minds by focusing solely on the moment of conversation to strengthen their "connection" with the other person.
The know-how that was key to their success and the techniques that helped them find creative solutions can all be found in this book.


Get what you want with a strength you thought was a weakness!
Negotiation techniques that ordinary people can only succeed with

Although there are numerous negotiation classes available, there is another reason why this class stands out.
Because it teaches 'ordinary' people how to negotiate 'without fail'.
Everyone has their own reasons for not being able to confidently say what they want in front of others, such as being shy, being emotional, not being able to say no, lacking experience, being weak with numbers, or being at a disadvantage because they are a woman or a man.
Mori Taherifor himself admits that he has been avoiding conflict due to his introverted personality.
The entrepreneurs featured in the book are also people who once lost confidence in the face of their own weaknesses.
But they soon change through class.
By revealing a personality that cannot hide its emotions, it builds a reputation for being honest and trustworthy, and even without speaking, it listens to others to obtain more information.
It's about discovering your own negotiation methods one by one.


The old negotiation formula no longer works, either in the field or in everyday life.
You also won't easily change your decision or agree to something just because the other person is eloquent or because they explain things strongly and logically.
We need to move beyond setting someone as a role model and imitating them.
There's no need to be a "cool and logical" negotiator if it doesn't suit your personality and temperament.
The success you achieve in this way never lasts long because it is achieved by hiding your true self.


The book you most likely don't need if you're stranded on a deserted island
If not, this is the book you need to have by your side right now!

Even today, as you read this, you have been to the negotiating table dozens of times.
Struggling with competing inner voices, arguing with a child who refuses to go to bed when it's late, trying to get a dog to come inside when he'd rather play outside, or weighing the pros and cons of a job offer without giving a clear answer.
In every endeavor, negotiation, talking and persuading someone inevitably follows.
Negotiation is closely tied to personal issues, so you must find your own way to negotiate with people—what moves their hearts.


What moves people?
This is the title of the book and probably the question you are most curious about.
There's no need to think too hard about it.
Just read Mori Taheripore's class.
We'll solve mock negotiations that changed the lives of Wharton School students and delve into the concerns of 5,000 entrepreneurs.
You will surely find the answer.