“I want to meet a good adult.
And I want to be a good adult too.”
The director of the Mental Growth Research Institute
Warm words of comfort for those passing through the afternoon of life.

These writings are fictional and not actual conversations, but that doesn't mean they aren't true.
There was a realistic concern that led me to pick up the pen, and thus there was a truth I wanted to find.
The struggle to escape the emptiness and anxiety of a midlife crisis, as well as to find God's will in it, is a religious and existential problem that many 'Mr. Jeong's' are experiencing.
The effort to live well in the latter half of life by following the advice of 'Mr. Choi' is truly a middle-aged seeker's yearning for truth.

We talked for a long time about the cycle of life, starting at dawn, passing through noon when the sun rises, and then the afternoon when the light becomes softer and the sunset.
The teacher said your time is night.
It's the last hour before falling into eternal sleep.
He said that there is no such thing as a good old age.
A good old age is just the result of a good middle age.
He also said that it would be good to spend this time, the most splendid beauty of the day before darkness falls, humbly and truthfully facing myself.
It's a shame you can't do that.
He said that whenever we meet in the future, we should talk about 'the true me, the true life' that we should look back on before night falls and when the sunset is in full bloom.
My heart is pounding.
I thought all that was left for me was old age.
It's a very quiet excitement I've never felt before.
I'm already looking forward to our next meeting.
---From the "Prologue"

I also stopped talking, following the teacher.
I stared at the river water, which seemed to stop and sparkle rather than flow.
And then I turned my head and looked at the teacher.
Her eyes, moist with tears, sparkled.
A book title, ‘Even tears sparkle when they meet light,’ suddenly came to mind.
And then the word 'reflection' followed.
Mr. Choi once said that growth in life does not come from positive experiences, but from reflection on experiences, whether positive or negative.
He said that the ability to reflect is what is observed in the most psychologically mature people.
I guess the power of reflection is what makes me bow my head when I talk about my failures.
Growing old means accumulating shame, but perhaps growing old well means deepening one's reflection on shame.
---From "The Powerless Power of Old Age, Reflections"

There is a saying that philosopher Schopenhauer said about life.
Life is a transaction where you spend the first 40 years preparing the text and the remaining 40 years annotating it.
Without annotations, it is impossible to properly understand the meaning contained in the text.
They say that in the later part of life, you have to write annotations about the days you have lived.
I think most couples, including Mr. K, are like that.
I'm sure he got married because he was attracted to something.
As you live, you see the other side of people, and you come into conflict with them in one way or another.
There must have been a fight at first.
Since people don't change, I give up and live again.
I have to raise a child too….
Living like that, you reach middle age and it is time to retire.
What I'm saying is that it doesn't end there.
As Schopenhauer said, the second half of life is about reflecting on the days you have lived and growing.
---From "The Twilight of a Couple, the Twilight of a Couple"

I think back to the title of the movie, “Our Souls at Night.”
After talking with the teacher, I think it would make sense to read it as 'Our bodies at night'.
Just like a body that has hardened over time, relationships and lifestyles that have become fixed over time cannot be fixed as we age.
I feel the weight of life when I see even Mr. Choi feeling regretful that he cannot do that.
The deep night of life may be the darkest hour because it is closer to heaven, which is brighter than sunlight.
Perhaps it is our destiny that in the final hours of life, our bodies and souls will fight a desperate battle against loneliness.
I take to heart the words of a wise old man in the deep night of life, the words of an old man with an awkward loneliness to face.
Before the curtain of the body falls, today, here, I will love with my body those who are bound by my body.
---From "At night, our souls and bodies"

So, what people who are afraid of getting dementia should do is live with transparent emotions.
I need to be honest with my feelings, not avoid them or suppress them.
We must treat others with our true feelings, and we must approach God with them in the same way.
That's all I can do today.
And if you want to help an elderly person with dementia, and you want to preserve their dignity, regardless of their behavior, you have to trust their feelings and listen to their emotions.
---From "Dementia, Memory, and Emotion"

From the first time I met Mr. Choi, the sunset caught my eye.
The teacher's living room was truly a 'sunset hotspot'.
So I used to draw the 'sunset time' of my life.
It is a time to quietly retreat into the night.
In his book, The Philosophy of Aging, James Hillman describes sunset as both a flame and a resistance.
It is not a light that meekly retreats and fades away toward the night, but a last resistance that contains an appeal for beauty.
Now that I think about it, it doesn't seem like the fiery evening sky is just going away.
Yes, it will soon be the time of the dog and the wolf and night will fall, but let us make one last appeal to beauty, one last resistance.
I'm going to try dyeing my hair orange to match the sunset glow on my white hair.
Life, the time when the sunset is in full bloom! I will face the time when I passionately let go of life.

---From the "Epilogue"