prolog
To parents of elementary school students taking their first steps into the world

Part 1: Social Skills You Must Learn in Elementary School

Teach your child social skills
Praise doesn't necessarily boost self-esteem.
The most crucial reason for not wanting to go to school
A minimum level of social skills must be fostered at home.
The child who yields is popular.
Understanding age and temperament reveals the causes of behavior.
Distinguish between moderate worry and anxiety disorder.
Your attitude toward winning and losing determines your tolerance for frustration.
What Elementary School Moms Need to Know About School

Part 2: Elementary School Children's Social Life and Friendships

Being sociable doesn't mean having a lot of friends.
You don't necessarily need a best friend
Don't react immediately to wrong behavior.
When you're worried about a friendship, change the way you ask questions.
A child's speech habits are solidified based on the mother's response.
Older children's friends' concerns: grouping
How to Wisely Deal with Elementary School Group Chat Problems
Keep parent-child relationships separate.
Should I report another child for bullying as school violence?

Part 3: Social Habits to Teach at Home

How to Teach Yourself to Start Habits
Teach the concept of time
Don't react to habitual irritation.
If someone didn't do something, don't ask why; just do it.
Don't be quick to assume your child is timid and lacks confidence.
How to Deal with Your Child's Lies
Correcting your eating behavior will increase the amount you eat.
Solving the Smartphone Dilemma
Parents' response to sibling fights is crucial.
When it comes to special occasion gifts, expectations are key.

Part 4 Elementary: Study Skills You Must Acquire

A mother's passionate management isn't the answer to a child's education.
Pay attention to executive function - A study sense that must be developed 1
Developing Concentration: The Study Sense You Must Develop 2
Test your attention-shifting skills: 3 essential study skills you must cultivate
Three Reasons Why Homework Is Difficult
High performance anxiety isn't always a good thing.
Principles for sending children who get bored easily to private academies
Things to Check Before Fighting Over School Issues
Everything You Need to Know About Choosing an Elementary School
Wrong actions lead to premature giving up.
More important than choosing a career is developing tolerance for frustration.

Part 5: Children's mental illnesses that elementary school parents worry about the most

Does a child who has experienced school violence need psychiatric counseling?
My child doesn't talk when he goes to school. Should I transfer him?
I think my child has a tic disorder.

What should I do if my child has ADHD?
I'm worried that my child may have autism spectrum disorder.

Does a child with a developmental disability need a disability diagnosis?
Misconceptions about pediatric psychiatric medication

Epilogue
You need to experience bad experiences to build your tolerance for frustration.

* A new work by Professor Cho Sun-mi, Korea's representative parent mentor, who appeared on You Quiz!
* Warm and realistic advice for anxious parents with elementary school children!
* Why do children often refuse to go to school, children with a fragile mentality who struggle with even the slightest inconvenience, and children who can't tolerate even the slightest complaint and become angry? Why do they do this? Clear solutions, backed by 30 years of clinical experience and expertise, in one book!

Parents of children about to enter elementary school feel anxious and overwhelmed, as if they are facing the biggest challenge of their lives. They have already sent their children to daycare and kindergarten, but school feels like another starting point in their child's life.
I thought everyone would go to elementary school when they were old enough, but now that I'm actually sending my child there, I have more than a few worries.
Professor Cho Sun-mi firmly emphasizes that elementary school is a very important period.
Children learn and become familiar with society through their experiences at ‘school’.
In the society they first encounter, children must learn autonomy and independence, and develop the resilience to frustration in order to grow.
That is the core of social skills that must be learned in elementary school.


Professor Cho Sun-mi says that the key to elementary school life is developing 'sociality', and the most important skill for this is frustration tolerance.
Developing social skills means becoming a member of society by being considerate of others, understanding them, and learning the rules and standards of society.
At school, children must learn things like, "I must consider the time and place when I say or do something," "I must complete my homework within the allotted time," and "I should be able to do things with my friends."
All of these are the child's first frustrations, and the ability to overcome these frustrations is called 'frustration tolerance'.


Many parents hope that their children will be noticed at school, praised by teachers, and loved by friends.
However, the first thing a child experiences when entering school is the reality that the level of attention at home and at school is different.
At home, my parents step in and fill in what I lack, but at school, I have to figure it out on my own.
This kind of ability doesn't develop naturally.
Parents must be guides and disciplinarians so that their children can find their own way.


The most common concerns of parents with elementary school children are usually divided into friends, studies, and life.
Professor Cho Sun-mi addresses these concerns one by one in this book.
The standard at this time is what the ultimate goal of solving all problems is.
In order to become a mature adult in a society where people live together, you must develop 'frustration tolerance'.
Professor Cho Sun-mi emphasizes that this is the core of elementary education.
If we have this goal in solving all our worries, any problem can be solved.


“There’s no need to worry if your child doesn’t have a best friend.”
“Why does my child only like strong friends?”

“No matter how I look at it, it seems like the child has no friends.
“Should I step forward and make friends for my child?” The issue of friends is the biggest concern for parents when sending their elementary school children to school.
I worry about looking gloomy because I don't have any friends, and I worry about only listening to my friends and putting my parents and teachers on the back burner.
In this book, Professor Cho Sun-mi says this:
What matters to a child is not the number of friends he has.
Contrary to popular belief, having many friends does not necessarily mean you are socially good, nor does having a best friend necessarily mean you are good at socializing.
The friends a child needs during his or her growth period should be those whom the child himself or herself feels are sufficient.
Also, friendships change depending on the child's age.
The important thing is that children, like adults, like friends who listen to their opinions and make concessions.
To become close friends, you need to teach them that consideration, compromise, and the ability to understand the other person's feelings are important.


How about a mother stepping up for her child's friendships? These days, many mothers find their children shy and timid, and try to create opportunities for them to play with friends.
However, the more a mother actively intervenes in a child's friendships or creates space for them, the more difficult it is for the child to learn and acquire social skills on his or her own.
Listening to Professor Cho Sun-mi's explanation, I get the feeling that the problem of children's friends, which mothers often find difficult to deal with, can be solved more easily than expected.

“What’s more important than good deeds or going to school is doing your homework well.”
“It is more important to prevent children from getting bored easily than to send them to a good academy.”

When children become elementary school students, they also become concerned about their learning.
From rumors that children who go to medical school are decided in the fourth grade of elementary school to rumors that something will go wrong if they don't attend a certain academy, various 'carder' communications are making mothers anxious.
Furthermore, there is a story about how we should encourage children to do good deeds for the sake of their self-esteem, and that if we force them to do too much, they will give up on all their studies early.
Many people say that studying is the key to building children's self-esteem and self-fulfillment.
But is that really true? Professor Cho Sun-mi's core message, based on numerous consultations, is this:
“The important thing is to arouse children’s motivation and will to study.
If you acquire the necessary study skills during this period, you can acquire other skills as you grow.
Children learn cognitive skills such as executive function, attention, and attention shifting, as well as a sense of learning, as they age.
“This is a skill that must be developed during elementary school.”

"Develop the habit of starting things yourself." "Teach them the concept of time."
“Don’t react to your child’s habitual tantrums.”

In addition, this book contains solutions to various concerns parents have.
It contains answers to everyday questions that all parents worry about at least once, such as how much to give as a Children's Day gift, to questions that elementary school parents may have, such as whether their child has a tic disorder, attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), or how to deal with children like these around them.
All parents expect their children to learn appropriate social skills and grow into independent adults with healthy, mature souls.
This book will provide appropriate answers to such parents.