Author's Note

Chapter 1: A remote island where housewives live

1.
“You said you were playing at home?”
2.
Why is the world of housewives so different? / Thorstein Veblen, The Theory of the Leisure Class
3.
If I Could Go Back, Would I Quit My Job Again? / Leslie Bennetts, What Work Means to Women
4.
Why I Hate Cooking / Ramun Sook, "I'm a Housewife"

Chapter 2: The Key Is Money

5.
What kind of world do I live in? / Karl Marx, Capital
6.
Why I Miss Company / Georg Simmel, The Philosophy of Money
7. Why I'm Not in the News / Katrine Marsal, "Wait a minute, Mr. Adam Smith, Who Made Dinner?"
8.
Why a Stay-at-Home Mom Who Raised Three Children Doesn't Get a Pension / Nancy Polbre, "The Invisible Heart"

Chapter 3: Living as a Woman in a Capitalist Society

9.
Who Burned the Women, and Why? / Silvia Federici, Caliban and the Witch
10.
Who Relies on Whom? / Maria Mies, Patriarchy and Capitalism
11.
What Should We Do for Coexistence? / Park Ga-bun, Phobia Feminism
12.
How can I see myself trapped inside my body? / Roy F.
Baumeister, The Expendable Man

Chapter 4: The World Beyond the Border

13.
Why We Should Pay for Domestic Work / Silvia Federici, The Zero Point of Revolution
14.
What kind of response would a nun receive if she published a book called "Daddy's Lessons"? / Beopryun, "Mom's Lessons"
15.
Can Single and Married Women Reunite? / Kim Ha-na and Hwang Seon-woo, "Two Women Living Together"
16.
Why Do Housewives Only Think About Their Families' Well-Being? / Seo Young-nam, Dandelion Noodle House

Closing remarks: The age-old lie that began with capitalism

Why do mothers get told they're "playing at home" even though they do housework all day?

There are people who are called housewives.
To children, she is called mother, and to her husband, she is called wife, housewife, wife, etc.
They do various types of work at home, but they are often asked, “Why are you playing at home and not doing this?”
Where on earth did this saying come from?

Uncovering the social, historical, and economic secrets of housework hidden in men's language.
―Why is my work not work?

Mothers who toil away at housework and childcare in the name of "love" and "devotion"! These so-called "housewives" are often overlooked as working people, despite spending all day doing housework.
I just did the dishes and they say I'm playing at home, I just finished cooking and they say I'm playing at home.
Every moment, one's actions are denied.

"The frustration of not being able to say something when it's not true!" This book, "The Lies You Tell at Home," is a product of listening to, reflecting on, and writing about the struggles of housewives in various positions.
The author uncovers the social, historical, and economic secrets of housework that have long been hidden in men's language.
We begin an exploration that delves deeper into the joys and sorrows, hardships, and empathy of housewives who take on all the housework, and delve into its origins with fundamental questions in our hearts.
Why has housework become so degraded? When and where did this phenomenon begin?

The author quit her job when her eldest child turned five (when she became pregnant with her second child).
Two weeks after I quit my job, I was on the phone with a friend when he said, “I heard you quit your job and are going to hang out at home?”
After a while, I also heard, “Aren’t you living comfortably on the money your husband earns?”
I've been thinking about it since then.
Is it true that housewives live comfortably with the money their husbands earn?

Since entering elementary school, the author has always had a place to belong, but when she quit her job and became a housewife, she suddenly lost her place to belong.
The daily life that unfolded under the name of housewife felt like a strange vacuum, vast but empty.
Mom, why is the world of housewives like this?
Why are housewives not included in the economically active population?
Where did it start?
Where does the uncertainty about whether children or work is more important come from?
Why is my labor not labor?
Such trivial but painfully fundamental questions.
"The Lies You Tell at Home" is a process of finding answers through reading to such questions and the discomfort felt as a mother and housewife.

It was great to hear mothers talk about how difficult it is and to empathize with them, but more than that, I wanted to look at the root causes of these problems from a realistic perspective.
I wanted to make it clear that our problems are related to a dark thing called 'money'.
My concern was one thing.
Why do mothers, even after spending all day doing housework, still hear the comment, "Just play at home"? Finding an answer to that question required something deeper than emotional confession or verbal consideration.
We need to talk about money! Money is at the heart of everything! Page 6, "Author's Note"

A journey through fifteen books to find the origin of the phrase 'playing at home'
Space-time travel

The fifteen books curated by the authors, including Thorstein Veblen's "The Theory of the Leisure Class," Karl Marx's "Capital," Georg Simmel's "The Philosophy of Money," Silvia Federici's "Caliban and the Witch" and "The Zero Point of Revolution," Katrine Marsal's "Wait a minute, Mr. Adam Smith, Who Made Dinner?", and Kim Ha-na and Hwang Seon-woo's "Two Women Living Together," all have a powerful feel.
The curation is heavy, but the style is ‘life-oriented.’
It is close to life because it is ‘close to life’.
The author stands on the existential foundation of being a mother of two children and a housewife, and clearly reveals the voices of reality and the field.


When and where did the phrase "playing at home" originate? "Why are there no women like mothers and housewives in economics?" "Why has the labor of housewives become unpaid labor?" "How has the image of the housewife been formed socioculturally?" "Can single and married women unite?" The book, "The Lie You Say You Play at Home," embarks on a journey through time and space with these questions in mind. It will provide a refreshing language to those who cannot call what they do "work."

If Chapter 1 of "The Lie You Talk About at Home" ponders how to embrace the lifestyle of a stay-at-home mom, Chapter 2 delves into the classics of "economics."
Mainstream economics books such as Marx's 『Capital』 and Georg Simmel's 『Philosophy of Money』.
The white rice is about the 'primitive accumulation' of capitalism.
The author connects her own experiences with those of women throughout history, providing a broader perspective on the social and historical context of women's labor, which was excluded from the original accumulation.
There are countless hands omitted from mainstream economics: the hands of unpaid caregivers, often called mothers or wives.
And the inclusion of this hand in economics will entail enormous political, economic, and cultural changes.


If Adam Smith had included the labor of his mother who prepared dinner as an economic factor when he wrote The Wealth of Nations, the history of economics would have been very different.
Women's care work and natural resources are like twins in that they were not included as components of the capitalist system from the beginning, and that they are freely used without recognition of their value.
Because of this, the concepts of ‘naturalness’ and ‘innateness’ have been attached to women’s motherhood and care work.

The author realizes that this process was not at all natural and realizes his current position.


I was able to answer the question, “Aren’t you living comfortably on the money your husband earns?” like this.
“I don’t live off the money my husband earns.
My husband can go out and work with peace of mind because I feed, clothe, house, and raise the children.
Let's assume I'm not here right now.
How could my husband possibly commute to work on time while caring for the kids and managing the household? How could he possibly go on a two-week business trip whenever he wanted? Even if I gave him all my earnings, I wouldn't be able to afford to pay someone else to do my job.
It is because there is a non-wage worker called 'me' that the husband can do wage labor.
Therefore, we cannot say that our relationship is one in which one person is unilaterally dependent on the other.
We are interdependent.
As with all other human relationships.” From text 142-143, “Who Relies on Whom?”

There are many anecdotes that are suitable for evoking empathy.
Even single women will find it refreshing! The connection between books and reality is seamless.
Additionally, he deliberately seeks out and reads books from opposing camps that are at the opposite end of his own thinking to solidify his thinking, and he also talks honestly about the parts of the books he has read that he finds disappointing.

We cannot separate the root of our existence, women, and feminism from the roles of mother and housewife.
In "The Lie You Tell at Home," money, women, feminism, care work, capitalism, family, welfare, the state, economics, and sociology are all intertwined, and it is presented in the style of a humanities essay.
Analyze sincerely and speak in everyday language without getting caught up in emotional responses.

A book that equips you with a cool, logical weapon on how to respond when someone attacks you illogically.
It even feels practical.
Wit and banter unfold at just the right time! The questions are heated, the answers are cool.
As the book progresses, the scope gradually expands to include national and social welfare policies.