Stephen had the great fortune of being selected as a torchbearer to carry the Olympic flame to the Olympic Stadium where Catherine Freeman would light the cauldron on the opening day.
It was an honor that ordinary people do not often experience, to be present at a place that confirms the solidarity of all mankind.
On that day, the hearts of mankind were in balance and harmony.
But as people dispersed and returned to their daily lives, that sense of high spirits and unity was easily lost.
How quickly the patient and polite demeanor devolved into impatient and complaining in the chaos and hustle of trying to find a way back to the car and escape the traffic jam.
We were cheering and applauding the Olympics and the unity of humanity, but the very next moment, we were all frustrated and yelling at the traffic jam, desperate to get out of here.
In both situations, our minds were initially happy with the experience and then became dissatisfied.
Deep in your heart there is a line.
It's a very thin line.
It's so thin that in most cases you don't even notice it's there.
But the way we live our lives is balanced along this line.
Our minds (what we call character) are quick to shift from one side of good to the other.
--- From "The Four Minds That Form the Principles of Life"

Most people face moments like this every day.
And then I think.
'Why did I say that?', 'If only I had...' We nag our children and spouses over small issues.
Blaming your teammates in front of others.
Agree to a deadline even though you know it's difficult to achieve.
Fortunately, we also turn our best intentions into reality every day.
There are times when I wish I could take back my words or make different choices.
In that short time, we can become more collaborative, focused, honest, patient, and dedicated.
The mind can shift very quickly from selfish to altruistic, from critical to compassionate, from motivated to depressed, from constructive to destructive, from doubtful to confident.
It can go from effective to ineffective in just one minute.
--- From "Chapter 1: The Four Minds Determine Everything"

Eva's 10-year-old son, Sam, was angry.
“Mom, I can’t afford a hotel!” Sam said, waving his hand in front of the Monopoly board between them.
There were still three spaces left before the horse could return to the starting space (where he would receive a salary of $200 if he passed this space - translator).
“You have entered my land.
“I have to pay,” she replied.
“Can you give it to me next time?”
Eva was annoyed by the question.
“This is a game, Sam.
“I’m trying to win.”
“Just this once.
“I’ll definitely give it to you next time.”
“I said no! You have to pay now.”
Eva flinched at his sharp voice, a voice that was not only filled with discontent but even anger.
It wouldn't have been strange if Sam had cried or gotten up and run into the room.
My heart sank.
'Why? Why did I just do that?'
She had unconsciously reverted to her working mindset.
And he felt that his 10-year-old son was interfering with his victory.
Why would she act so competitively toward her son, to the point of venting her frustrations and arguing, even though she genuinely wanted him to have a pleasant evening? Why couldn't she anticipate the consequences and stop herself before it was too late?
Why do we do that?
--- From Chapter 2, “Why Do I Repeat This Behavior?”

The thing that both of us encounter the most resistance to is the idea that competition is an ineffective behavior below the line.
People say competition is a good thing.
Of course, we also believe that healthy competition helps us achieve our goals.
But unhealthy, pride-driven competitive behavior is different from winning above the line, striving to be our best.
Competitive behavior is not about winning through dignity, respect, honor, or honesty.
It's about defeating others, winning at any cost, and feeling like you're a person of value.
Think of all the inspiring stories you've heard in the world of professional sports.
Compare the stories of those who achieved victory or accepted defeat with dignity through honesty and integrity to those who ruined their careers and reputations through cheating, drug use, and match-fixing.
That difference is the key to achievements that come from humility and achievements that come from pride.

--- From "Chapter 4: What Type of Heart Am I"

Tomorrow, next week, next month… .
There's probably already something on your schedule that's causing stress in your life.
It could be a meeting with your boss about a project that isn't going as planned, a difficult performance meeting with your team members, or a conversation with a guest who has been staying too long and is becoming a nuisance.
Whatever it is, something about the situation will trigger you, and your brain will pull out one of those old frames it's been pulling out for years in similar situations.
You know this.
As is often the case, things will not end well.

We prepare agendas, slides, and reports for meetings.
Take the time to perfect your vacation plans and talk about them at your next gathering.
And yet, we rarely think about designing our character (attitude, thoughts, and actions).
Even though I know it might be stimulating.
Character design keeps you on track and feeling good about interactions, especially difficult ones.
The method is simple.
It only takes five steps.
If you invest just five minutes into this activity, you can alleviate the situation below the line before it even starts.

--- From "Chapter 6: 3-Step Strategy to Stay on the Line"