“You don’t always have to be a good person.
Now the country must be on my side!”

To a life that respects myself without being overly considerate anymore
The Art of the Mind to Regain Control of Relationships and Life

This book asks those who have consumed themselves in the name of 'consideration' and 'devotion'.

“How kind are you to yourself?”

This book was written for those who have always put others first and put their own feelings on the back burner, and those who have wanted to be good people but ended up feeling exhausted and empty.
Now, we will guide you on the path to creating healthy relationships and a balanced mind by placing 'me' at the center of your life.
Based on psychological insights, it helps you reflect on yourself by examining how the tendencies and emotions formed through childhood experiences affect your current life.
It guides you step-by-step through the process of letting go of the habit of trying to look good to others and transitioning from being a “good person” to being a “good person to myself” and into an attitude of respecting and caring for yourself.
In the process, you can understand yourself, heal your wounded inner self, and liberate your mind.
Now, before anyone else, please be on my side.
Let's take the first step through this book.

If you guess what the other person is thinking and give up when it's time to make a request or refuse, you will end up being the only one who feels uncomfortable and hurt.
If you reject a request for personal reasons and the other person is overly upset, it's the other person's fault for not considering your circumstances and not being able to process their emotions in a healthy way.
People who are sensitive to others' reactions become discouraged when others express anger or frustration, and instead of asserting themselves, they try to accommodate the other person.
The other person's anger and resentment are emotions he has to deal with.
It's not my part.
It's important in life to assert your thoughts, to say no to requests, to ask for favors sometimes, and to try things out.
--- p.46 From “Not trusting myself creates misunderstandings in relationships”

As I lived my life trying to do something for someone, trying to be a good person to others, while ignoring my own heart and desires, I gradually forgot myself.
As I tried to satisfy someone whose standards of satisfaction I had no idea about, I couldn't help but push myself harder and harder.
It's about leading me into a perfection that has no end in sight.
Perfectionism and responsibility.
You have a kind and honest nature, but what if you started caring about your own well-being instead of worrying about the well-being of others? I hope you can see the real me you've been forgetting for a while.
--- p.102 From “The most meaningful growth comes when no one notices”

There is one area where I put a lot of effort when consulting.
It is an exposure of weaknesses.
I feel better after exposing my weaknesses.
Because you don't have to try to hide it anymore.
There's no need to wear a mask or worry about what others think of me.
This will give you peace of mind.
I have the freedom to show myself naturally and look at others.
Relationships become more comfortable when you can see each other.
--- p.130 From “The thought that it’s okay to be lacking liberates the mind”

Molecular biologist Sydney Brenner coined the term "Ockham's broom."
It's a term that refers to the act of sweeping an inconvenient truth under the rug and hiding it.
A society that says being considerate of others is admirable, parents' values ​​that tell us certain behaviors are absolutely unacceptable, and my desire to be loved have become Occam's brooms that sweep my true feelings under the rug.
We need to relearn how to listen to our inner voice.
The countless hours I spend ignoring my intuition come back to me like a boomerang.

--- p.202 From “Let’s not feel sorry out of habit, but focus on the signals in our hearts”