Almost the opposite happiness
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Description
Book Introduction
Nanda's first essay, "Acoustic Life" Days of living as a woman, a writer, and a mother “If only I could have one person in this objective world who I could love endlessly.” Nanda, the creator of 『Acoustic Life』, a synonym for daily cartoons, has published his first essay. "Acoustic Life," which began serialization in 2010 and has been running for nine years, has resonated with countless readers and has grown alongside the life of author Nanda. After getting married and having children, the author entered another world, and her readership also expanded. It contains a story that anyone in their 20s to 40s living in this era can nod their head to. The biggest change in "Acoustic Life" occurred when the author gave birth to a child. Having and raising a child was a huge change for the author, as she confessed, “As someone who is particularly fond of the word ‘boundary,’ loving a baby was quite a risky thing.” Sometimes I heard from readers that I had changed, and I tried not to admit it. However, after overcoming the beastly days of parenting, the author fully accepted her other roommate, Ai, and decided to face her own changes as well. I have included the times I spent there in this book, “Almost Opposite Happiness.” I often hear from readers that they have changed since the baby was born. At first, I didn't want to admit it, as if change was a bad thing. Then I gradually began to accept it. While raising a baby, I walked along a path filled with gemstones, but I didn't want to bother picking up sharp stones. I soon learned that there was no need to fret about whether I had changed or lost myself. The stones that were not picked out are still there. _From "Prologue" 『Almost Opposite Happiness』 is another acoustic life that began after meeting my daughter. A story about the time when the child was one with the author, from birth until he turned three years old. As she confessed, “I ended up talking a lot about myself, which was different from my original plan of including my child’s growth, but I think it’s okay,” the story focuses on the child, and more than anything, it also contains the daily experiences of a woman and a writer while raising a child. |
- You can preview some of the book's contents.
Preview
index
Prologue_As the line begins to be drawn between you and me
You came out of the hat
The feeling of giving birth to a person
Don't worry, it'll be okay.
Two faint but definite lines
My lens
Let's get along, roommate
Being pregnant
Gobi
Obstetrics and Gynecology Impressions
Don't walk with your stomach sticking out
If you walk and walk again
About meeting the galaxy in the black pupils
A child born with a deadline
A 60-year fight
The world became brighter only after you were born.
When the bell rings in the nursing room
What's happening in the lower abdomen
Chaos of chaos and beauty
The night I put the puppy to sleep
Parenting RPG
All kinds of posthumous names from all over the world
We laughed out loud
Time you don't know
Gravity
Taking a walk with someone who is seeing the world for the first time
First boots
The Secret of Dendemua
Fisherman's purse
Crazy love, nighttime gloom, and beer
The taxi driver said
The galaxy is gone, but
50 kilogram human vs.
11 kilogram human
The secret is in your fingers
Coexisting with Pen Destroyer
It's all because of the title
What they don't teach
Time you don't know
Three Mornings
The peas came out
That's how you become the primary caregiver
gazes
Recording, remembering
Graceful Side Dish Shop
A brief fantasy at the neighborhood playground
Ryan Reynolds's trick
A familiar smell
How to work in a swarm of locusts
This child will grow up to be a sociable child.
your guardian
Behaving like an adult
A fun photography lesson with baby mice
What is life like with children?
Mom works every day, every day, every day
Deep night button monster
Until the hotbar ends
Epilogue_There's still a lot of story left
You came out of the hat
The feeling of giving birth to a person
Don't worry, it'll be okay.
Two faint but definite lines
My lens
Let's get along, roommate
Being pregnant
Gobi
Obstetrics and Gynecology Impressions
Don't walk with your stomach sticking out
If you walk and walk again
About meeting the galaxy in the black pupils
A child born with a deadline
A 60-year fight
The world became brighter only after you were born.
When the bell rings in the nursing room
What's happening in the lower abdomen
Chaos of chaos and beauty
The night I put the puppy to sleep
Parenting RPG
All kinds of posthumous names from all over the world
We laughed out loud
Time you don't know
Gravity
Taking a walk with someone who is seeing the world for the first time
First boots
The Secret of Dendemua
Fisherman's purse
Crazy love, nighttime gloom, and beer
The taxi driver said
The galaxy is gone, but
50 kilogram human vs.
11 kilogram human
The secret is in your fingers
Coexisting with Pen Destroyer
It's all because of the title
What they don't teach
Time you don't know
Three Mornings
The peas came out
That's how you become the primary caregiver
gazes
Recording, remembering
Graceful Side Dish Shop
A brief fantasy at the neighborhood playground
Ryan Reynolds's trick
A familiar smell
How to work in a swarm of locusts
This child will grow up to be a sociable child.
your guardian
Behaving like an adult
A fun photography lesson with baby mice
What is life like with children?
Mom works every day, every day, every day
Deep night button monster
Until the hotbar ends
Epilogue_There's still a lot of story left
Detailed image
Into the book
For me, the change from a two-person family to a three-person family was a seismic shift.
The more hands you can hold on shaky ground, the better.
Even if we fall together sometimes.
When the vibrations die down, you'll be able to walk happily without holding hands.
--- p.79
I developed a habit of finding Siho's face in all kinds of living things in all kinds of places.
In other people's babies I meet on the street, in Clementine, my daughter who doesn't know what to do in the lullaby my husband sings (this song makes me cry just listening to it), in the faces of fluffy baby birds and stray cats in picture books.
--- p.127
Siho fell asleep in the stroller while we were out for a walk, and since he was sleeping for so long, I was worried that he might fall asleep late at night, so I decided to wake him up.
I put my face close to Siho's and quietly called his name so that he wouldn't be startled by the changed scenery when he opened his eyes.
Do you know how much your mother loves you right now?
Don't you know how pretty you are?
He whispers quietly enough that such feelings can be transferred to Siho in their entirety.
Just like when the nurse came to me on the day he was born, I greeted Siho, who was awake and dazed, in the brightest voice I could muster.
As if to tell you, 'It's okay, the world welcomes you.'
--- p.130
In the afternoon, I lit candles on a small cake.
We laughed out loud again as we watched Siho struggle to create wind with his mouth.
My mother gave birth to me when she was twenty-one.
My mom said I was pretty and bit her elbow.
My mom, who cried and cried endlessly on my wedding day.
Did my mother laugh like this while raising me?
If that were the case, I would feel a little less sorry.
--- p.136
It's so much fun to take a walk with someone who's seeing the world for the first time.
He is amazed and delighted by everything, from fallen leaves on the road, pine cones, dust on car hoods, cement marks between bricks, lines drawn in parking lots (Siho always stands on the 'dragon' in the word 'fire' painted on the ground for a long time), and even BB guns stuck in the cracks of sidewalk blocks.
When going for a walk, you don't even need to prepare toys or snacks in case your dog cries.
--- p.145
Growth is amazing.
Siho, who had her own galaxy in her eyes, is now four years old and turns on the planetarium every night with her own hands to observe the constellations of the solar system.
Then he lies down in bed and tells me what he saw that day.
As if he were giving me a stone he had picked up outside and putting it in my hand.
“Mom, did I kiss Woojin at kindergarten today?”
“Then what did Woojin say?”
“Woojin’s mouth smiled brightly.”
In the darkness, Siho spreads out two index fingers and makes a smiley face.
“Like this, like this, the mouth went up.”
You saw something really cool, Siho.
--- p.184~185
As the weather gets cooler, Siho and I go to the playground every day.
When Siho sets off for the playground, he declares war(?) from 100 meters ahead, saying, “Friends, I’m coming!”
When you enter the playground, greet everyone by saying, “Hello, friends!”
Even if no one accepts you, say hello over and over again.
Greeting and jumping are this child's soul.
Thanks to our daughter, my husband and I are looking back on our childhoods.
I can't believe that such a cute kid grew up to be such a cold-hearted adult like us.
--- p.291
When Siho returned home, she sat on my lap and kept nagging me as if something had happened.
Then, all of a sudden, he tilts his head back so that his neck is bent and stares at my face.
Sometimes, even while being held, Siho confirms that her mother is behind her.
I think as I look at that face.
I want to do anything to protect you.
I want to be a mother who can grab someone's hair at least once in my life.
The more hands you can hold on shaky ground, the better.
Even if we fall together sometimes.
When the vibrations die down, you'll be able to walk happily without holding hands.
--- p.79
I developed a habit of finding Siho's face in all kinds of living things in all kinds of places.
In other people's babies I meet on the street, in Clementine, my daughter who doesn't know what to do in the lullaby my husband sings (this song makes me cry just listening to it), in the faces of fluffy baby birds and stray cats in picture books.
--- p.127
Siho fell asleep in the stroller while we were out for a walk, and since he was sleeping for so long, I was worried that he might fall asleep late at night, so I decided to wake him up.
I put my face close to Siho's and quietly called his name so that he wouldn't be startled by the changed scenery when he opened his eyes.
Do you know how much your mother loves you right now?
Don't you know how pretty you are?
He whispers quietly enough that such feelings can be transferred to Siho in their entirety.
Just like when the nurse came to me on the day he was born, I greeted Siho, who was awake and dazed, in the brightest voice I could muster.
As if to tell you, 'It's okay, the world welcomes you.'
--- p.130
In the afternoon, I lit candles on a small cake.
We laughed out loud again as we watched Siho struggle to create wind with his mouth.
My mother gave birth to me when she was twenty-one.
My mom said I was pretty and bit her elbow.
My mom, who cried and cried endlessly on my wedding day.
Did my mother laugh like this while raising me?
If that were the case, I would feel a little less sorry.
--- p.136
It's so much fun to take a walk with someone who's seeing the world for the first time.
He is amazed and delighted by everything, from fallen leaves on the road, pine cones, dust on car hoods, cement marks between bricks, lines drawn in parking lots (Siho always stands on the 'dragon' in the word 'fire' painted on the ground for a long time), and even BB guns stuck in the cracks of sidewalk blocks.
When going for a walk, you don't even need to prepare toys or snacks in case your dog cries.
--- p.145
Growth is amazing.
Siho, who had her own galaxy in her eyes, is now four years old and turns on the planetarium every night with her own hands to observe the constellations of the solar system.
Then he lies down in bed and tells me what he saw that day.
As if he were giving me a stone he had picked up outside and putting it in my hand.
“Mom, did I kiss Woojin at kindergarten today?”
“Then what did Woojin say?”
“Woojin’s mouth smiled brightly.”
In the darkness, Siho spreads out two index fingers and makes a smiley face.
“Like this, like this, the mouth went up.”
You saw something really cool, Siho.
--- p.184~185
As the weather gets cooler, Siho and I go to the playground every day.
When Siho sets off for the playground, he declares war(?) from 100 meters ahead, saying, “Friends, I’m coming!”
When you enter the playground, greet everyone by saying, “Hello, friends!”
Even if no one accepts you, say hello over and over again.
Greeting and jumping are this child's soul.
Thanks to our daughter, my husband and I are looking back on our childhoods.
I can't believe that such a cute kid grew up to be such a cold-hearted adult like us.
--- p.291
When Siho returned home, she sat on my lap and kept nagging me as if something had happened.
Then, all of a sudden, he tilts his head back so that his neck is bent and stares at my face.
Sometimes, even while being held, Siho confirms that her mother is behind her.
I think as I look at that face.
I want to do anything to protect you.
I want to be a mother who can grab someone's hair at least once in my life.
--- p.294~295
Publisher's Review
Chaos of chaos and beauty
“I've developed a habit of finding your face in all living things, everywhere.”
One day, she discovered “two faint but definite lines” on a pregnancy test, and the baby arrived, giving her “the feeling of a rabbit jumping out of a hat.”
A child born with a deadline brought happiness I could never have imagined, but the reality of parenting was also something I could never have imagined.
From the difficult breastfeeding process, to raising a child in step with my husband, to even serializing a comic book, I was overwhelmed with everything I had to manage.
When I raised my own baby, I realized that he brought me nothing but joy.
He ate well and slept well, so he became plump and chubby every day, and the way he cried while sleeping was so cute that I thought this was what a baby should do.
When I lay my baby down to change his diaper or apply lotion after a bath, he looked at me with eyes that were free from suspicion and fear.
At those moments, I felt like the empty places in my body were filled with something warm.
The baby seemed to grow every hour, and the exhaustion and happiness of witnessing all that time made me a mother.
It was my husband who made me unhappy.
_From pages 76-77
The appearance of a child, which was close to a seismic shift, found stability over time, and as I learned about the world through the eyes of a child, I felt beauty anew even in the “chaos of chaos.”
Like someone who has just begun to love, the new mother, who was “very happy when she was happy and very tired when she was tired,” is now naturally finding a balance between her life and her child’s life.
I still miss the days when I didn't have children, but I have one person who I can smile brightly and beautifully in front of more than anyone else: my child.
When Siho holds the camera and moves it around with serious gestures, I quickly find my place and look at Siho.
The expression I make when Siho takes my picture is a little different from when someone else takes my picture.
He laughs very softly and very happily.
I also (almost) always like the way my face looks in photos.
I always hated the photos of myself where I tried to smile naturally but ended up failing.
Why is that?
Why don't I feel awkward?
I realized this when I told Siho the shutter position again and stood in front of the camera.
I started smiling at Siho instead of at the camera.
I laughed out loud because Siho was so cute while taking pictures.
I can't smile like that in front of anyone's camera.
_From page 310
Recording, remembering
"After meeting you, I feel a sense of responsibility to repair the world."
The author, who has lived within her own rigid boundaries, is now enjoying a happiness that is "almost the opposite" of what she had before while raising a child, and is now living a love triangle with her child and husband.
I'm on a pleasant tightrope walk, constantly wavering in life with my child, but without losing either my child or myself.
As I begin to live with my baby, I feel that my garden of happiness has grown larger.
How about the warm scalp and sweat of a sleeping baby, the sharp beak-like mouth pressed against your cheeks, the curve of your round cheeks, and the feeling of your fingers carefully running over the five pea brothers clinging to your soles?
I am enjoying a happiness that is almost the opposite of what it was before I had a baby.
Civilized happiness vs. primitive happiness. (If you can be happy just by feeling the thickness of a baby's foot, what else is this if not primitive?
Moreover, it is true that happiness as a civilized person is rapidly declining.)
_From pages 126-127
When the author meets a child, he sees the world through the child's eyes, and only then does he begin to pay attention to the underprivileged in the world and pledge to increase the total amount of kindness in the world.
A mother who reflects on herself and is reborn as her child grows.
In that sense, 『Almost Opposite Happiness』 is a growth story that anyone can relate to.
Raising a child like “days of thunder, lightning, and confetti” is a sad thing, and now the child seems to be growing up too quickly, so much so that it brings tears to the eyes, but the author feels relieved when he counts the child’s age.
Because there's still a lot of story left.
Readers who watch this will also look back on their own lives and write their own stories.
“I've developed a habit of finding your face in all living things, everywhere.”
One day, she discovered “two faint but definite lines” on a pregnancy test, and the baby arrived, giving her “the feeling of a rabbit jumping out of a hat.”
A child born with a deadline brought happiness I could never have imagined, but the reality of parenting was also something I could never have imagined.
From the difficult breastfeeding process, to raising a child in step with my husband, to even serializing a comic book, I was overwhelmed with everything I had to manage.
When I raised my own baby, I realized that he brought me nothing but joy.
He ate well and slept well, so he became plump and chubby every day, and the way he cried while sleeping was so cute that I thought this was what a baby should do.
When I lay my baby down to change his diaper or apply lotion after a bath, he looked at me with eyes that were free from suspicion and fear.
At those moments, I felt like the empty places in my body were filled with something warm.
The baby seemed to grow every hour, and the exhaustion and happiness of witnessing all that time made me a mother.
It was my husband who made me unhappy.
_From pages 76-77
The appearance of a child, which was close to a seismic shift, found stability over time, and as I learned about the world through the eyes of a child, I felt beauty anew even in the “chaos of chaos.”
Like someone who has just begun to love, the new mother, who was “very happy when she was happy and very tired when she was tired,” is now naturally finding a balance between her life and her child’s life.
I still miss the days when I didn't have children, but I have one person who I can smile brightly and beautifully in front of more than anyone else: my child.
When Siho holds the camera and moves it around with serious gestures, I quickly find my place and look at Siho.
The expression I make when Siho takes my picture is a little different from when someone else takes my picture.
He laughs very softly and very happily.
I also (almost) always like the way my face looks in photos.
I always hated the photos of myself where I tried to smile naturally but ended up failing.
Why is that?
Why don't I feel awkward?
I realized this when I told Siho the shutter position again and stood in front of the camera.
I started smiling at Siho instead of at the camera.
I laughed out loud because Siho was so cute while taking pictures.
I can't smile like that in front of anyone's camera.
_From page 310
Recording, remembering
"After meeting you, I feel a sense of responsibility to repair the world."
The author, who has lived within her own rigid boundaries, is now enjoying a happiness that is "almost the opposite" of what she had before while raising a child, and is now living a love triangle with her child and husband.
I'm on a pleasant tightrope walk, constantly wavering in life with my child, but without losing either my child or myself.
As I begin to live with my baby, I feel that my garden of happiness has grown larger.
How about the warm scalp and sweat of a sleeping baby, the sharp beak-like mouth pressed against your cheeks, the curve of your round cheeks, and the feeling of your fingers carefully running over the five pea brothers clinging to your soles?
I am enjoying a happiness that is almost the opposite of what it was before I had a baby.
Civilized happiness vs. primitive happiness. (If you can be happy just by feeling the thickness of a baby's foot, what else is this if not primitive?
Moreover, it is true that happiness as a civilized person is rapidly declining.)
_From pages 126-127
When the author meets a child, he sees the world through the child's eyes, and only then does he begin to pay attention to the underprivileged in the world and pledge to increase the total amount of kindness in the world.
A mother who reflects on herself and is reborn as her child grows.
In that sense, 『Almost Opposite Happiness』 is a growth story that anyone can relate to.
Raising a child like “days of thunder, lightning, and confetti” is a sad thing, and now the child seems to be growing up too quickly, so much so that it brings tears to the eyes, but the author feels relieved when he counts the child’s age.
Because there's still a lot of story left.
Readers who watch this will also look back on their own lives and write their own stories.
GOODS SPECIFICS
- Date of publication: February 28, 2018
- Page count, weight, size: 336 pages | 560g | 205*150*30mm
- ISBN13: 9791162203002
- ISBN10: 1162203005
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