“I loved being surrounded by the light and shadow they cast.”
The story of a passionate friendship that has lasted 30 years.

Confucius once said:
“When a friend comes from far away, isn’t that a joy?” Meanwhile, many people in our time say this.
“What’s so great about friends?” Author Yang Da-sol would be wide-eyed in surprise at these words.
In this age of timelessness, lack of money, and even cold hearts, he has lived a life of charging head-on toward friendship.
As soon as his friend finished asking in a light voice if he would come, he was on his bike, racing down the snowy road, completely paralyzed by heavy snow.
Even if soapy water is dripping from your head, even if you are about to take a bite of delicious rice, even if you need to take care of an urgent task that you have been holding back, when a friend calls, you are the one who always answers the phone with “Hello?”
He always thinks.
If we could meet today, nothing would be better than that.

My introduction is simple.
“This is Yang Dasol.
“I’m ○○’s friend.” When someone asked, “What do you do?”, even though I was a regular office worker, I would say this.
“I am ○○’s friend.
That's my first job.
I haven't made any business cards yet.
“I do all sorts of side jobs, but they don’t really explain who I am.” He even listed several people he wanted to impress.
“You know? I’m ○○’s friend, ○○’s best friend, and I’m said to be ○○’s only friend.”
--- p.21

As for me, I've been somewhat shy since I was little.
“You don’t go to other people’s houses and open their refrigerators!” Mom snapped fiercely.
There are already rumors going around among mothers.
I blinked and typed it into my head.
Don't open other people's refrigerators.
I don't know why, but it doesn't seem to work.

--- p.24

I've always been a weirdo since I was a kid.
I felt terribly horrible.
Loving me like this felt next to impossible.
I rather loved my friend.
And I grew up borrowing the love they gave me in return.
I began to believe in myself by reflecting their trust little by little.

--- p.29

“After school, you would go out and try to persuade your friends in the neighborhood and bring them home.
And then, instead of playing, he just stood guard at the front door.
“Because I thought the kids would be leaving soon.”
My mother recalled that I was very sincere to others since I was little.
The moment I heard those words, the cool sensation of the doorstep touching my soles came back to me.

--- pp.35~36

Maybe I wanted to say this.
“Please don’t leave me like this.” That feeling is still surprisingly vivid.
Even the firm, cool feel of the door sill that fits the arch of your foot perfectly.
At times like that, I wonder if time really flows.
(…) As time goes by, some parts of my life are being covered by new things and changing their shape, but next to them, there is still a child standing guard at the threshold.

--- pp.37~38

If I think about it, most of the times I spent with my friends, I never felt like I was 'together'.
Rather than believing that you would always be by my side, I believed that you could leave me without saying a word at any time.
I believed that he was hiding his dislike for me and that he would betray me, abandon me, and leave me alone.
And at the same time, I wanted to believe that wasn't the case.
That heart shone like a small star in the vast and dark sea of ​​distrust like the night sky.

--- pp.53~54

He had never heard of or experienced complaints, and he had always been able to resolve difficulties on his own. He was completely at a loss in the face of my endless stream of sorrows.
Even though I opened my mouth, I couldn't say anything and kept closing it again.
He was trying to comfort.
He opened his mouth like a carp and then whispered.
“It’s a secret… but actually, I’m a princess ant.”
--- p.72

I don't think I'll ever be able to speak properly about them.
All I know is about me.
I live every day as someone who loves something.
(…) I became a person who whispered words like “pretty”, “you lovely thing”, and “you fool” at least ten times a day.
I became a person who decided that I should live at least while they were alive in this world, and that I should earn enough to feed them and myself.
I became the kind of person who didn't get angry when they ruined the carpet, made a mess of the house, broke dishes, peed on my cotton sheets, and pooped on my ankles, all at once.

--- pp.96~97

After running for a while, I saw a small, round dot in the distance.
It grew bigger and bigger, and then it raised its arm and waved at me.
I gasped and said that in the distance there were forests and fields, a large swimming pool, exotic buildings and colorful flowers.
And then I passed my mother again and turned onto a new path.
(…) I went very far away from my mom like a yoyo and then came back.
The road forked and continued several times.
Moments drifted apart and overlapped.
Every time, my mother was smiling from afar.
He didn't even ask what I saw.
You see what I see.

--- pp.134~135

The day changed when they got the call.
The things that had been weighing me down like a rock suddenly became lighter the moment I picked up the phone and said them out loud.
The stones of pessimism that had been rising endlessly no matter how much I picked them turned a blind eye for a moment.
The moment they laughed, they shrank to stones and rolled around on the palm of my hand.
Even in the painful memories, there seemed to be a cute corner.
Only then did it become an anecdote.

--- p.142