“If you want to change your frustrating life, start by designing your ‘emotions’!”

This book is about 'Why can't we change even though we know?'
Provides scientific and practical answers

“I made a resolution, but why do I keep putting it off?”, “My plans are perfect, but why do they always last only three days?”, “Why do I keep having the same regrets?” When faced with questions like these, we often blame our reason.
It's because of weak will, lack of thought, and lack of training.
But this book directly challenges this familiar convention.


The author states firmly:
“It’s not the thoughts, it’s the ‘feelings’ that matter.” He delved deeply into over 1,000 books on biology, psychology, and brain science, and the insights he gained from them fundamentally changed his life.
And rather than simply providing emotional comfort, it scientifically and persuasively explains how emotions govern human behavior.

According to him, humans are 'thinking, emotional beings'.
We believe that we make choices logically, but in reality, emotions make decisions first, and reason justifies them later.
So, even though we know we 'should' do something, we keep failing to take action.
It's not a matter of will, it's just that the 'emotional brain' isn't working.

As the interesting metaphor in the book suggests, there are two puppies living inside our brains.
One is a 'left-brained puppy' who growls with fear and worry, and the other is a 'right-brained puppy' who runs around with curiosity and passion.
The real problem is that we are leaving these puppies to live unattended without knowing how to train and discipline them.
Despite the clear scientific fact that emotions shape our lives, we still cling to the age-old illusion that reason alone is sufficient.
But reason that ignores emotions never works.

From survival to love, consumption, education, leadership, habits, addictions, and goal achievement, emotions are the energy that drives all human behavior.
This book provides a friendly, easy-to-follow guide to understanding, designing, and training emotions.
It is not simply a book on emotional theory.
This is an 'emotional training manual' based on the author's practical experiences, including the attic flooding incident, overcoming childhood trauma, and successful real estate investment.
As we close the book, we are confronted with an important realization.

“Your actions change when your mood changes, and your emotions change when your life moves.” The reason your resolutions always fall through, why your plans seem great but don’t get executed, why you’re always anxious and exhausted—it’s not your thoughts, it’s your emotions.
Only those who understand and manage their emotions can truly transform themselves and, by extension, their lives.
After all, that's the only way we can change our lives.

** Why can't I just take action, even when I know I need to? Why am I so lazy? The secret lies in emotions.
Yes, that's right.
The obvious reason we are lazy is because of emotions.
The reason we don't do what we need to do is simple.
Because I don't want to do it.
In other words, it's because I'm not feeling well right now, and that feeling isn't getting any better.
What does this mean? It literally means that it's "emotions" that create actions.
The key to all actions is whether or not the emotions accept it.

** First, when information comes in from the outside, our emotional brain first determines whether the information is safe.
And emotions give that information 'value' and, furthermore, 'meaning'.
Information interpreted through emotions in this way soon influences thoughts and actions, and these two factors in turn interact with emotions to shape the direction of our lives.
“Emotions create thoughts, and thoughts in turn create emotions.” “Emotions lead to actions, and actions in turn create emotions.”

** When values ​​formed through emotions and experiences are repeated and solidified into beliefs, they create a frame of thought called a frame or worldview, and further become established as beliefs, identity, and ultimately the essence of my existence.
When identity is formed in this way, the way you view the world, your behavior patterns, and even your standards of judgment change.

** Emotions create values, values ​​shape our worldview, worldview builds our identity, and we live based on that identity.
So, if we repeatedly feel the emotion of 'I am worthless', our brain accepts that state and forms our own identity.

** If you want to live a good life, you must first create good emotions.
In other words, neglecting your emotions is no different from neglecting your life.
When a person who lives by emotions neglects his emotions, the price will eventually come back to his own life.

** Identity is a belief in values.
As mentioned earlier, values ​​cannot be changed through reason, but only through experiences that involve emotional changes (emotions × actions).
The only way to change your values ​​is to experience something that runs counter to your values.
Only then will your faith change.
Then your goals change, new motivation is created, and new persistence is born.
And the starting point of all values ​​is 'the emotional response to thoughts and actions.'

** On the outside, they may seem to have a high opinion of their own abilities, but deep down, they have more self-doubt than faith in themselves, so they cannot muster up true courage.
That is, we return to the familiar emotional state of escape.
After this repetition, we create for ourselves a limited identity as someone who “can’t do what they want,” rather than someone who “can do what they want.”
As a result, actions are constantly postponed, and there is no change in neuronal patterns.

** Neuroscientist Jill Bolte Taylor says we have the power to choose what kind of being we want to be in this world at every moment, and that power lies in our brain cells.
That is, we have the ability to deliberately select and shape the connections between our neurons, and we are no longer bound to a life reflexively driven by our emotions.

** Our brain reacts to our thoughts and creates our reality based on those thoughts.
And we have the ability to renew ourselves at any time through our thoughts, feelings, and actions.
Of course, that change takes effort, but what could be more important than changing your mind?

** Neuroscientists Dr. Andrew Newberg and Dr. Robert Waldman also revealed that 'words' have such a powerful power that they can even influence the expression of genes that regulate stress in the body and mind.
They explain that simply thinking of positive words can activate specific areas of the brain, which can positively change not only your self-perception but also the way you view others.

** Self-esteem that is strong only in front of the weak is a weak emotion that easily crumbles in front of the strong.
A person with truly high self-esteem can accept even their negative aspects as they are.
Being overly conscious of other people's gaze is in the same vein.
We waste unnecessary energy worrying about what others think.
This is not concern for myself, but rather a drain on my energy for the thoughts and actions of others that I can never change.

** Pain arises from reacting to sensations.
On the other hand, if you do not respond to the sensation, the pain can also disappear.
There is always a ‘body sensation’ between me and the world.
We react not to the events in the external world themselves, but to the sensations within our bodies that arise through those events.
Therefore, ‘sensation’ and ‘reaction’ are the deepest secrets of our mind.

** If you simply observe the sensations occurring in your body and continue to practice not reacting to them, you can change the brain's habit of automatically reacting to the world.
That is, as the brain gradually begins to look at itself objectively, the reflexive response patterns of the emotional brain gradually change.

** Our brains contain approximately 100 billion neurons and 1,000 trillion synapses, which exchange information in an astonishing combination.
The moment you start reading, these vast numbers of neurons are activated and new brain circuits begin to form.
Connections between neurons react throughout the brain in an extremely short time of one thousandth of a second, and during this time, the 'reading circuit' mobilizes almost all brain regions, including the entire cerebral cortex, including the frontal lobe, temporal lobe, parietal lobe, and occipital lobe, as well as the limbic system, diencephalon, cerebellum, and brainstem.

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