Prologue: The desire to become something

01 Contains beauty to give you

Because I want to give you a beautiful life - our arms are too small to hold only beauty.
Slowly, slowly - don't forget, your pace.
I'll wait - half of life is waiting.
So there's no need to be impatient.
Happiness as much as a bite of a croissant - because tomorrow's croissant will be waiting for you.
The rest - it seems like the answer is just right.
It can't be used.

Become a song - There's no need to cry even if the world ends.
Because we'll be there for you.
Sitting face to face - If there's someone you can be with at arm's length, there's nothing more you could ask for.
Star Child - You'll find out as you walk.

02 We still love each other as if we were destroyed

A life without love - there can be no such thing.
Just - the six principles are of little use in explaining the mind.
Waste - It's okay to waste some things without hesitation.
One day, one base - just look at the ball in front of you.
Those distant stands seem so far away.
By your side - If you wonder who you are, look around you.
On the way to the festival - when you hit a wall, just look back.
Or, it would be a good idea to just sit down and rest for a while.
When you make eye contact - there are so many things in the world that cannot be captured even with a good camera.

03 The Uselessness of the Days Lived, the Beauty of the Days to Come

Big is convenient - but even the biggest person in the world isn't bigger than the universe.
Small is convenient - no need to obsess over size.
The house and you too.
10 Centimeters - There is nothing more difficult to understand than the heart of a loved one.
The Material of Light - To draw light, you must draw darkness.
There's nothing I can do.

Remember your mother - there was someone who gave you unconditional love.
That fact is as great as the Big Bang.
Remember Dad - Even my father, who never gave up, eventually got diagnosed.
Foolishness or regret - every second is precious and precious.
Two-person triangle - We are a team.
Just leave it to me.
Why go to such lengths - move for others so that you don't have to.


04 Run hard.
You can't catch me tomorrow

Choose a time - it will make you breathe.
Things that are gone - Good things don't disappear quickly.
Without time to guard.

It may seem like a small thing, but it helps - when closing the window doesn't stop the misery, try this.
It's somewhere - just believing in it changes reality.
Let's go to the future - follow freedom.
If it's difficult, then long for it.
If that's too difficult, try saying it out loud.
Take it slow, one page at a time - don't rush.
It's okay to go slowly.
Forward - This is the best way to say love.

Books cited

“This book is a beautiful record that the author has carefully selected for children.
“It’s a list of loves you can’t help but peek at.”
- Kim Shin-ji (essayist)

“How can love be so overflowing?
“If it’s a love story like this, I could read it over and over again.”
- Hwang In-chan (poet)

If something has to happen, I want to be with you
A record of moments of leaning on and expecting from each other

There are many things I want to be for my loved ones: a pleasant conversationalist, a useful guide, a running mate, etc.
From abstract things like “a good father” to specific things like “a father who writes without shame.”
This is an essay by author Choi Dong-min titled "We Are Each Other's First" about two people who wanted to become something "plausible" even if it didn't seem great, and about the time they have spent leaning on each other and their expectations for the future.


Let me introduce the characters in this book, which was written with the mindset of, "If you want to achieve something, do it together."
First of all, D, a father and husband who loves to dream, is quiet, and is good at waiting.
J., a mother and wife who loves family law, is honest, and hates waiting.
A child who sleeps next to two people with different personalities, similar thoughts, and the same heart, i likes to ride on swings and play in the sand, and is deep.
Here's why I chose to speak in the third person with initials rather than the first person:

This is because this story is a love story between people who are each other's first.
And because all the love stories in the world are similar to each other.

So maybe that's why it's so similar to your story.
- From the prologue

D and J, who held hands perfectly while walking and could be honest with each other while looking into each other's eyes, and who chose to live 'a life together', are about to become parents. They are still anxious and immature, and are anxious about what they can do for their child. This story begins with a book they opened, and a sentence they encountered in that book - "If you want to write a beautiful story, first live a beautiful life." (Kim Yeon-su, from "A Novelist's Work").

D and J decide that although they don't seem to be living a life of beauty yet, they should start by collecting beauty.
If I do that, I will be able to live a wonderful life, and at least I will be able to give the wonderful things I have collected to i.


D carefully collects sentences from books, music, movies, dramas, and affectionate conversations, one by one, and writes a piece for the two of them.
And we discover special moments in everyday life that we thought were so ordinary and insignificant.
It's as small as a bite of a croissant, as far as an arm's length, as small as a house that's big enough for a two-and-a-half-seater sofa, but it's also a precious moment that has nothing to throw away.


It adds warmth when you feel lonely or anxious and helps you enjoy the happiness of this moment.
A heart that passes on the words left behind by the star that has gone before

“We Are Each Other’s First” is filled with sentences that I hope will be present in every moment of a child’s life.
I hope I won't be consumed by the memories of the difficult yesterdays, but I know I can never escape them, so I open Raymond Carver's book and, if I ever tire of the daily grind, I lean on Paul Auster's words that a book "builds up very slowly, page by page."
Through James Salter's old book, "The Great Spoon," I will convey the "blessing of life" that can be felt when sitting at the table together, through Émile Ajar's "The Life Before Us," I will convey the unbelievable truth that "one cannot live without love," and through Yun Dong-ju's writing, I will convey the heart that can shake off the dirt and get back up even if one falls.
Of course, I know that the naps, sunshine, walks, and swing rides of the present will help the child grow and smile more, so I also want to show him more good things.
I try to keep in my heart even the scenery and moments that cannot be captured on camera.

If the day of human destruction were to come, like a scene from a movie, I would add this pledge to the lyrics I would like to hear together - “In the morning you will rise singing / You will spread your wings and take over the sky / No one will harm you until the morning” (〈Summertime〉).
“Because your dad and mom will be by your side.”

By believing with all their hearts, the three of them form a perfect team.

“Come to think of it, I’m so glad we’re together.
There are so many things I couldn't have done alone.
“I already feel sad when I think about it.”
I meant it.
J and D, and i.
The three of them worked as a team, and because they were a team, they worked.
- Page 219

Growing up with a child, I learned
The best way to talk about love

Children grow up so quickly.
The baby who used to wake up every few hours to feed and then go back to sleep has grown and started talking.
Parents also grow up with such children.
The sea, which I thought was calm, was so vast that it seemed as if it could embrace the whole world when I looked at it while bending my knees to match the height of a child.
Now that I'm an adult with less time for happiness on my daily schedule, I'm starting to wish my children would at least choose time for themselves.
I also resolve to never yell at my child, and to just watch silently like Jim Hopper, the father in the drama "Stranger Things."
Just thinking that my child might one day leave me far away, where no signal can reach me, makes every second count and every moment precious.
And now, as they miss their mothers and fathers who are no longer with them, they realize anew that their faith has shaped them.
Because everyone was a child once.

Belief changes surprisingly many things.
That was my mother's faith in Romain Gary, and that was my mother's faith in J.
D was the same.
D's mother also never lost faith in her son.
There was no law that forced anyone to do anything, and no case of criticizing anyone for not doing anything.
Whatever happened was entirely D's fault, and whatever didn't happen was your fault.
Maybe that's why.
Success and failure.
In that cruel OX game, J and D could not worry or hesitate much.
Although that vast freedom has sometimes been a burden, most of the time it has been a positive thing.
Faith changes so many things.
- Page 190

J, who takes out a 'piece of optimism' and tells D, who is shaken by instability and doesn't know what to do after hitting a wall, that he can take a break; i, who smiles happily as if she is enjoying it for the first time no matter how high you push her on the swing, and always looks forward to what will happen tomorrow; for these two, writer Choi Dong-min remembers Camus' words, "The best way to talk about something you love is to talk about it simply," and decides to write and live that way.

Regarding “We Are Each Other’s First,” author Kim Shin-ji says it is “a beautifully crafted record carefully selected for children” and “a list of love that cannot be overlooked,” while poet Hwang In-chan says, “If it is a piece of writing about love like this, you can read it over and over again.”
I would also like to add to this list of readers' favorites and favorite love stories.