★ New work by Seo Hanna, author of "Love's Silverfish"
★ Highly recommended by poet Ko Seon-gyeong, "Shower Gel and Soda Water."
“He must have come to suffocate me.
Now he stands in every summer place I loved.”
-Go Seon-gyeong, poet

"The impatience toward something and the subsequent lull are, of course, the very essence of this season."
On living in a summer state of boredom and fascination in one day

As we enter the middle of summer, a book has been published that will make you experience this season in a different way.
The protagonist is the new work, What I Wanted in Summer, by Seo Hanna, who was praised by fellow writers as “the writer with the most eloquent writing among her peers” when her first prose collection, “Love’s Silver Lining,” was published.

In this book, instead of the scorching sun that seems ready to burn at any moment, the sweat-soaked outerwear, and the discomfort index that seems to make even humanity disappear, we encounter the author's unique romanticism that is enthusiastic about the image of 'summer.'
The author says, “Summer is about inflating everything beyond its reality, imagining things that aren’t there, and as if reality were something, thinking that what has disappeared exists in some way next to me.”
For example, the allure of summer is talking about the love of a summer gone by, or liking a summer that can never return, finding music or movies that sing of such summers and playing them over and over again, missing the youth of hot countries and living in the weary present.
It is in line with the saying, “The excitement toward something and the subsequent lull are things of this season.”
As poet Ko Seon-gyeong, who recommended this book, said, “He must have come to suffocate us all.
Now he will stand in every summer place we loved.”

“While writing this, I listened to music by someone who sang like a beast.
I watched a sweaty movie.
On the tennis court, at the pool.
I've seen movies where people want each other at the same time but don't say a word.
(…) For me, that is what summer is like.
Boredom and fascination are both present in one day, and noon and midnight cannot be so different.
“Rather than describing a happy time on a summer day, I wanted to talk about living in a state of summer, no matter what time it is.” (p. 8)

“Since this book is about summer, I tried to write it like someone singing with their whole body, like a player who rushed at the king of kings and was defeated miserably.
“The excitement for something and the subsequent lull are, of course, things of this season.” (p. 8)

The beginning of love is breaking up with him and thinking about him.
It's about finding the traces he left behind in the world.
(…) Wasn’t it nice to have a short car ride with him back then?
Wouldn't it be better to listen to the song with him than to listen to it alone?
Where was that willow-lined path I ran on back then? Was it always like that? Now, without him, the song doesn't feel the same, and the path doesn't feel the same, and that's starting to feel unfortunate.
--- p.32

We never said a word about our feelings for each other.
Nothing has been more painful to me than this.
I confirm everything with words.
‘Do you like me? How much do you like me?’ and… .
But nothing about this person was possible to put into words, so it was hard to believe that love was truly between us.
(…) The outside lights came into the car and in the darkness, he and I looked at each other as we talked about something.
It was like a confession of love in an unknown language.
--- pp.34-35

After that, I went through a series of things in my life and realized that everyone has a defensive wall and they live without breaking it down or looking into it.
That means you can live and die without feeling the need to change, whether it helps you or not, even if it's a little uncomfortable.
As long as that wall is there, you can neither give love to others nor receive love.
Still, some people choose to give up love and protect themselves.
--- p.67

I think it's okay to touch his hair when he looks cute.
I feel like I can hug him when he tosses and turns in his sleep.
I believe it's okay to say good night to him and place your palm on his cheek before leaving the room.
I think I can like that kid forever.
If he had a rapper boyfriend and she became the most impressive woman at his concerts, I would spend the whole day upset and wish the rapper would go to jail, but I still couldn't stop watching him.
--- p.108

If you ask what I look forward to in summer, it's definitely the night.
Summer nights never wear out no matter how much you use them.
There is also a female student who rents a public bicycle and rides it to Cheonbyeon and back, and continues to walk the same path while talking on the phone.
People say they hate humid weather, but they really like it.
That's why I walk into the moisture.
--- p.116

As my mom said, watermelon tastes best before midsummer starts.
There's nothing quite like the refreshing sweetness of a crisp, watery bite.
I went to my mom's house and unexpectedly got some watermelon.
The sweetness of cutting the watermelon in half with a large knife, filling a plate with slices enough to ask who will eat it all, and then picking up the fallen watermelon and chewing it without thinking.
It was especially sweet and refreshing to eat watermelon in that comfortable state, with nothing to do, no responsibilities, and no need to throw away the watermelon rind.
--- p.135

The beginning of love is breaking up with him and thinking about him.
It's about finding the traces he left behind in the world.
(…) Wasn’t it nice to have a short car ride with him back then?
Wouldn't it be better to listen to the song with him than to listen to it alone?
Where was that willow-lined path I ran on back then? Was it always like that? Now, without him, the song doesn't feel the same, and the path doesn't feel the same, and that's starting to feel unfortunate.
--- p.32

We never said a word about our feelings for each other.
Nothing has been more painful to me than this.
I confirm everything with words.
‘Do you like me? How much do you like me?’ and… .
But nothing about this person was possible to put into words, so it was hard to believe that love was truly between us.
(…) The outside lights came into the car and in the darkness, he and I looked at each other as we talked about something.
It was like a confession of love in an unknown language.
--- pp.34-35

After that, I went through a series of things in my life and realized that everyone has a defensive wall and they live without breaking it down or looking into it.
That means you can live and die without feeling the need to change, whether it helps you or not, even if it's a little uncomfortable.
As long as that wall is there, you can neither give love to others nor receive love.
Still, some people choose to give up love and protect themselves.
--- p.67

I think it's okay to touch his hair when he looks cute.
I feel like I can hug him when he tosses and turns in his sleep.
I believe it's okay to say good night to him and place your palm on his cheek before leaving the room.
I think I can like that kid forever.
If he had a rapper boyfriend and she became the most impressive woman at his concerts, I would spend the whole day upset and wish the rapper would go to jail, but I still couldn't stop watching him.
--- p.108

If you ask what I look forward to in summer, it's definitely the night.
Summer nights never wear out no matter how much you use them.
There is also a female student who rents a public bicycle and rides it to Cheonbyeon and back, and continues to walk the same path while talking on the phone.
People say they hate humid weather, but they really like it.
That's why I walk into the moisture.
--- p.116

As my mom said, watermelon tastes best before midsummer starts.
There's nothing quite like the refreshing sweetness of a crisp, watery bite.
I went to my mom's house and unexpectedly got some watermelon.
The sweetness of cutting the watermelon in half with a large knife, filling a plate with slices that will fill the plate enough to ask who will eat it all, and then picking up the fallen watermelon and chewing it without thinking.
It was especially sweet and refreshing to eat watermelon in that comfortable state, with nothing to do, no responsibilities, and no need to throw away the watermelon rind.
--- p.135

Even though I didn't read anything, that time was over.
There was no discomfort in my body, I could hear the sound of a car passing by in the distance, and the fatigue of playing in the water created a feeling of languidness and freedom as time passed.
The wind did nothing but stir the leaves floating on the pool and bring the scent of the grass from outside.
There was a small table in front of me where I could put my feet, and the coffee was fragrant and had plenty of ice.
--- pp.213-214

Our motorboat was the color of cream mixed with a drop of lemon juice.
The sea and sand looked like paint had been poured over them.
As the boat began to drift away, making a tremendous noise and roaring, I thought, 'The old white is pretty.'
People's bare feet, the water splashing, T-shirts clinging to their bodies and shirts blowing in the wind, warm, wet bodies.
Now I am in a country that is colder than Korea and I am walking through a city covered in snow.
When walking down the street, be careful not to get hit by a falling sign.
Because there are many good things in the world.
--- p.216

Sometimes I think that memories that are entangled in space are too scary.
Whenever I go there, the days when I used to frequent that place come rushing back, and I start to cherish the people I used to hang out with often back then.
At that time, the present or the current circumstances or anything like that are not important at all.
Only past memories and the feelings of that time become important.
It's a big deal whether a place disappears or remains the same.
--- p.232

I've been looking for a perfume that can smell like a summer night even when it's not summer, but perhaps because perfume has to be good, I've never been able to achieve that smell.
The smell of plankton, bacteria, and bad things mixed together.
The smell of dirt and dust.
Bad luck… .
Does it take all of that combined to create a nostalgic smell?
I came back from my trip and turned on a game called 'Pikmin Bloom'.
I picked up a lemon.
They said it would take 24 days to get it.
It was a yellow, fresh lemon.

--- pp.258-259