Talking to Children with ADHD and Autism
 |
Description
Book Introduction
A specialist with 30 years of experience tells you
Talking to a child with a developmental disability to help them grow
He is very clingy, has trouble getting along with friends, keeps losing things, is unusually distracted, has difficulty studying and takes a long time to do homework…
‘Is it my child?!’ Parents become anxious when their child shows signs of being different from their peers.
When a child is diagnosed with a developmental disability such as attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), autism spectrum disorder, or a learning disability, the worry and anxiety about how to raise the child can keep you up at night.
Professor Hideo Honda, author of “Talking to Children with ADHD and Autism to Help Them Grow,” says that parents do not need to blame themselves or be shocked if their child “does not adapt well to groups” or “does not do the same as other children.”
I advise treating developmental disabilities like myopia.
Just as a nearsighted child who cannot read the blackboard can be helped to solve the problem by sitting in front of the child or making them wear glasses, the idea is to understand that your child has such a characteristic and respond naturally accordingly.
This book is written by a child psychiatrist with over 30 years of clinical experience, and provides specific guidance on how to approach children with developmental disabilities, from scolding and praising them to coping with situations, tailored to each child's characteristics, as if consulting them in a clinic.
From infancy to adolescence, it contains 28 real-life examples, ranging from small daily tasks like getting dressed, eating, and organizing, to studying, friends, games, homework, school refusal, and bullying.
Based on practical and friendly explanations based on extensive clinical experience, it provides effective solutions on how to speak to and respond to children.
Talking to a child with a developmental disability to help them grow
He is very clingy, has trouble getting along with friends, keeps losing things, is unusually distracted, has difficulty studying and takes a long time to do homework…
‘Is it my child?!’ Parents become anxious when their child shows signs of being different from their peers.
When a child is diagnosed with a developmental disability such as attention deficit hyperactivity disorder (ADHD), autism spectrum disorder, or a learning disability, the worry and anxiety about how to raise the child can keep you up at night.
Professor Hideo Honda, author of “Talking to Children with ADHD and Autism to Help Them Grow,” says that parents do not need to blame themselves or be shocked if their child “does not adapt well to groups” or “does not do the same as other children.”
I advise treating developmental disabilities like myopia.
Just as a nearsighted child who cannot read the blackboard can be helped to solve the problem by sitting in front of the child or making them wear glasses, the idea is to understand that your child has such a characteristic and respond naturally accordingly.
This book is written by a child psychiatrist with over 30 years of clinical experience, and provides specific guidance on how to approach children with developmental disabilities, from scolding and praising them to coping with situations, tailored to each child's characteristics, as if consulting them in a clinic.
From infancy to adolescence, it contains 28 real-life examples, ranging from small daily tasks like getting dressed, eating, and organizing, to studying, friends, games, homework, school refusal, and bullying.
Based on practical and friendly explanations based on extensive clinical experience, it provides effective solutions on how to speak to and respond to children.
- You can preview some of the book's contents.
Preview
index
Chapter 1: 8 Things to Consider When Raising a Child with a Developmental Disability
Q1 What should I say to a child who picked a small strawberry?
Q2 What should I say to my child who keeps turning the light switch on and off?
Q3 What should I say to a child who keeps picking up rocks?
Q4 How should I deal with a child who keeps losing things?
Q5 What should I do if my child doesn't want to participate in group play?
Q6 What should I do if my child has difficulty getting dressed?
Q7 What should I do if my child eats the lunch alone first?
Q8 What is the solution for a child who struggles with studying and spends a lot of time on homework?
Chapter 2 To properly understand developmental disabilities
'Developmental disability', a general term for several disabilities
It's more of a 'minority race' than a disease
The discomfort of developmental disabilities in the media
Can developmental disabilities really be called 'disabilities'?
#Gray is not white, but a faint black
Like the swan in "The Ugly Duckling"
People who engage in 'social camouflage behavior'
Gray children should grow up to be gray adults.
3 Tips for Raising a Child with Developmental Disabilities
The kind of adult you become depends on your parenting style.
Chapter 3: Praise and scolding should be different for children with developmental disabilities.
How to Praise a Child with a Developmental Disability: The Key Word is 'Inner Thoughts'
Can you understand your child's 'likes'?
Praising children with AS and ADH characteristics
Praise Point: Can You Praise Without Any Illusion?
What children want to do is different from what parents want them to do.
How to Scold a Child with a Developmental Disability: The Key Word is 'Sincerity'
There are three main types of 'scolding'.
Teaching behavior improvement techniques in a 'separate context'
Scolding Point: "Parents' Sincerity Will Be Tested."
From 'praise and scolding' to 'praise and not praise'
Lack of ability should not be scolded.
Vygotsky's 'zone of proximal development'
Chapter 4: Living with a Developmental Disability - Situational Points
You don't have to force yourself to do things you're not good at.
How do you learn your own way?
Which is more important, studying or daily life?
● Part 1: Life Skills
Situational Points ① Grooming
Situational Point ② Meal
Situational Point ③ Helping with Housework
Situational Point ④ Organization and Tidying Up
Situational Points ⑤ Lost and Found (Management of Belongings)
Situational Point ⑥ Appointment (Schedule Management)
Situational Point ⑦ Allowance (Money Management)
Situational Point ⑧ Lack of Sleep (Health Management)
Situational Points ⑨ Manners
● Part 2: Interpersonal Relationships, Studying, and School
Situational Point ⑩ Interpersonal Relationships
Situational Points ⑪ Play/Hobbies
Situational Points ⑫ Game
Situational Point ⑬ Smartphone
Situational Point ⑭ Homework
Situational Point ⑮ Study
Situational Points? Reading
Situational Points? Exercise
Situational Points? Learn
Situational Points? Refusal to Go to School
Situational Points? Bullying
Chapter 5: Parenting for Developmentally Disabled Children: How to Make Your Child Happy
Think about whether the child is enjoying it.
It's best not to overdo school education.
Parents' Perceptions of Inclusive Education as Wrong
Developing based on the child's strengths
Early detection and early intervention are crucial.
Controlling the pace makes it more comfortable for both parents and children.
The characteristics remain the same, but the quality of life improves.
Q1 What should I say to a child who picked a small strawberry?
Q2 What should I say to my child who keeps turning the light switch on and off?
Q3 What should I say to a child who keeps picking up rocks?
Q4 How should I deal with a child who keeps losing things?
Q5 What should I do if my child doesn't want to participate in group play?
Q6 What should I do if my child has difficulty getting dressed?
Q7 What should I do if my child eats the lunch alone first?
Q8 What is the solution for a child who struggles with studying and spends a lot of time on homework?
Chapter 2 To properly understand developmental disabilities
'Developmental disability', a general term for several disabilities
It's more of a 'minority race' than a disease
The discomfort of developmental disabilities in the media
Can developmental disabilities really be called 'disabilities'?
#Gray is not white, but a faint black
Like the swan in "The Ugly Duckling"
People who engage in 'social camouflage behavior'
Gray children should grow up to be gray adults.
3 Tips for Raising a Child with Developmental Disabilities
The kind of adult you become depends on your parenting style.
Chapter 3: Praise and scolding should be different for children with developmental disabilities.
How to Praise a Child with a Developmental Disability: The Key Word is 'Inner Thoughts'
Can you understand your child's 'likes'?
Praising children with AS and ADH characteristics
Praise Point: Can You Praise Without Any Illusion?
What children want to do is different from what parents want them to do.
How to Scold a Child with a Developmental Disability: The Key Word is 'Sincerity'
There are three main types of 'scolding'.
Teaching behavior improvement techniques in a 'separate context'
Scolding Point: "Parents' Sincerity Will Be Tested."
From 'praise and scolding' to 'praise and not praise'
Lack of ability should not be scolded.
Vygotsky's 'zone of proximal development'
Chapter 4: Living with a Developmental Disability - Situational Points
You don't have to force yourself to do things you're not good at.
How do you learn your own way?
Which is more important, studying or daily life?
● Part 1: Life Skills
Situational Points ① Grooming
Situational Point ② Meal
Situational Point ③ Helping with Housework
Situational Point ④ Organization and Tidying Up
Situational Points ⑤ Lost and Found (Management of Belongings)
Situational Point ⑥ Appointment (Schedule Management)
Situational Point ⑦ Allowance (Money Management)
Situational Point ⑧ Lack of Sleep (Health Management)
Situational Points ⑨ Manners
● Part 2: Interpersonal Relationships, Studying, and School
Situational Point ⑩ Interpersonal Relationships
Situational Points ⑪ Play/Hobbies
Situational Points ⑫ Game
Situational Point ⑬ Smartphone
Situational Point ⑭ Homework
Situational Point ⑮ Study
Situational Points? Reading
Situational Points? Exercise
Situational Points? Learn
Situational Points? Refusal to Go to School
Situational Points? Bullying
Chapter 5: Parenting for Developmentally Disabled Children: How to Make Your Child Happy
Think about whether the child is enjoying it.
It's best not to overdo school education.
Parents' Perceptions of Inclusive Education as Wrong
Developing based on the child's strengths
Early detection and early intervention are crucial.
Controlling the pace makes it more comfortable for both parents and children.
The characteristics remain the same, but the quality of life improves.
Detailed image
Into the book
You shouldn't tell a child with a developmental disability to "be friends."
Among children with developmental disabilities, when their parents tell them to 'get along with their friends,' some develop an obsession with 'having to get along with friends,' and try to accommodate others by making concessions no matter what they do.
Some children over-adapt to activities they are not interested in or areas they are not good at, thinking that they have to endure them in order to get along with their friends.
This will cause stress to build up in the child.
---p.58 From “Chapter 2: To Properly Understand Developmental Disabilities _ You Shouldn’t Say ‘Get Along Well with Friends’”
When I counsel parents and children on various issues every day, I often hear from parents who are worried about scolding their children too much, saying, "I can't just leave them alone because they're my child."
At times like that, I say, 'It would be good to scold them as if you were looking after their children.'
---p.95 From “Chapter 3: Praise and scolding should be different for children with developmental disabilities _ I think I am taking care of a relative’s child.”
If your child struggles with both schoolwork and the daily tasks required to maintain a normal life, and has difficulty completing both tasks at the same time, you should not choose between the two.
Because while you can start studying whenever you find a field you like, the longer you put off studying things related to daily life, the more difficult it becomes.
Among children with developmental disabilities, when their parents tell them to 'get along with their friends,' some develop an obsession with 'having to get along with friends,' and try to accommodate others by making concessions no matter what they do.
Some children over-adapt to activities they are not interested in or areas they are not good at, thinking that they have to endure them in order to get along with their friends.
This will cause stress to build up in the child.
---p.58 From “Chapter 2: To Properly Understand Developmental Disabilities _ You Shouldn’t Say ‘Get Along Well with Friends’”
When I counsel parents and children on various issues every day, I often hear from parents who are worried about scolding their children too much, saying, "I can't just leave them alone because they're my child."
At times like that, I say, 'It would be good to scold them as if you were looking after their children.'
---p.95 From “Chapter 3: Praise and scolding should be different for children with developmental disabilities _ I think I am taking care of a relative’s child.”
If your child struggles with both schoolwork and the daily tasks required to maintain a normal life, and has difficulty completing both tasks at the same time, you should not choose between the two.
Because while you can start studying whenever you find a field you like, the longer you put off studying things related to daily life, the more difficult it becomes.
---p.133 From “Chapter 4 Living with a Developmentally Disabled Child - Points by Situation - If possible, daily life skills should be taught from infancy.”
Publisher's Review
A must-read for those caring for children with developmental disabilities.
Written by a developmental disorder specialist based on 30 years of clinical experience
A completely new approach
“You shouldn’t say ‘be friendly with your friends.’”
“The phrase ‘at least to this extent’ is NG.”
“Homework is useless.”
“Gray is not white, but a faint black.”
…
From the perspective of a parent with a child with a developmental disability, this is a completely different and unexpected statement from what is found in existing parenting books.
The author, Professor Hideo Honda, is a developmental disorder specialist who began working as a psychiatrist in 1988 and has accumulated over 30 years of clinical experience.
We have been counseling children since they were young, through childhood and adolescence, until they become adults.
Currently, I am in charge of treating elementary and middle school students with behavioral or emotional problems such as school refusal, domestic violence, depression, and anxiety.
In April 2022, an NHK special broadcast revealed research findings that could help alleviate the anxiety and concerns of parents of children with developmental disabilities.
The author of this book, Professor Hideo Honda, discovered through 20 years of follow-up research that ‘liking things’ can have a positive effect on children’s social participation and independent living by increasing their motivation.
The results of this study are attracting worldwide attention.
This book contains only the information that the author, having met numerous children with developmental disabilities in his clinic, wanted to convey to their parents.
It is emphasized that parenting should be done from the child's perspective, putting aside the parents' position, desires, and plans.
It means that children with developmental disabilities who grow at different rates should not be compared to children around them, but rather each child should be allowed to grow at his or her own pace.
There are three key points to remember for a child's growth: "Don't conform to the majority," "Don't conform to the average," and "Don't conform to your friends."
This book, with its fresh perspectives and suggestions from the author, will transform the way you care for children with developmental disabilities and build confidence. I recommend it to parents of children with developmental disabilities, including ADHD, autism spectrum disorder, and learning disabilities, as well as anyone who encounters children with developmental disabilities, including daycare centers, kindergartens, schools, therapy centers, and healthcare workers.
Developmental disability, which is known to affect 1 in 11 elementary and middle school students (data from Japan's Ministry of Education, Culture, Sports, Science and Technology, published in December 2022).
In our country, the number of cases is increasing to the point where at least one person per class is diagnosed.
If all adults properly understand developmental disabilities, even children who are a little different from others will be able to live happy lives.
Speaking positively
If a child refuses to do something he or she is not good at or dislikes, the adults around him or her may say, "You should do this without being tricky."
In such cases, obsessive children may reluctantly hold on and do it, but there are also children who cannot do it no matter what.
For a child with a developmental disability, it may not be possible to achieve 'this much' through one's own efforts.
When you fail to achieve something, you may lose confidence.
The author says that when a child with a developmental disability is pressured about something they are not good at, it is best to avoid it with all one's might.
Don't waste your time trying too hard to meet other people's standards, run away with confidence.
Rather than suffering, getting hurt, and losing confidence, it is much more meaningful to get help with things you are not good at and expand your scope of activities in things you are good at or enjoy.
That way you can learn more.
Written by a developmental disorder specialist based on 30 years of clinical experience
A completely new approach
“You shouldn’t say ‘be friendly with your friends.’”
“The phrase ‘at least to this extent’ is NG.”
“Homework is useless.”
“Gray is not white, but a faint black.”
…
From the perspective of a parent with a child with a developmental disability, this is a completely different and unexpected statement from what is found in existing parenting books.
The author, Professor Hideo Honda, is a developmental disorder specialist who began working as a psychiatrist in 1988 and has accumulated over 30 years of clinical experience.
We have been counseling children since they were young, through childhood and adolescence, until they become adults.
Currently, I am in charge of treating elementary and middle school students with behavioral or emotional problems such as school refusal, domestic violence, depression, and anxiety.
In April 2022, an NHK special broadcast revealed research findings that could help alleviate the anxiety and concerns of parents of children with developmental disabilities.
The author of this book, Professor Hideo Honda, discovered through 20 years of follow-up research that ‘liking things’ can have a positive effect on children’s social participation and independent living by increasing their motivation.
The results of this study are attracting worldwide attention.
This book contains only the information that the author, having met numerous children with developmental disabilities in his clinic, wanted to convey to their parents.
It is emphasized that parenting should be done from the child's perspective, putting aside the parents' position, desires, and plans.
It means that children with developmental disabilities who grow at different rates should not be compared to children around them, but rather each child should be allowed to grow at his or her own pace.
There are three key points to remember for a child's growth: "Don't conform to the majority," "Don't conform to the average," and "Don't conform to your friends."
This book, with its fresh perspectives and suggestions from the author, will transform the way you care for children with developmental disabilities and build confidence. I recommend it to parents of children with developmental disabilities, including ADHD, autism spectrum disorder, and learning disabilities, as well as anyone who encounters children with developmental disabilities, including daycare centers, kindergartens, schools, therapy centers, and healthcare workers.
Developmental disability, which is known to affect 1 in 11 elementary and middle school students (data from Japan's Ministry of Education, Culture, Sports, Science and Technology, published in December 2022).
In our country, the number of cases is increasing to the point where at least one person per class is diagnosed.
If all adults properly understand developmental disabilities, even children who are a little different from others will be able to live happy lives.
Speaking positively
If a child refuses to do something he or she is not good at or dislikes, the adults around him or her may say, "You should do this without being tricky."
In such cases, obsessive children may reluctantly hold on and do it, but there are also children who cannot do it no matter what.
For a child with a developmental disability, it may not be possible to achieve 'this much' through one's own efforts.
When you fail to achieve something, you may lose confidence.
The author says that when a child with a developmental disability is pressured about something they are not good at, it is best to avoid it with all one's might.
Don't waste your time trying too hard to meet other people's standards, run away with confidence.
Rather than suffering, getting hurt, and losing confidence, it is much more meaningful to get help with things you are not good at and expand your scope of activities in things you are good at or enjoy.
That way you can learn more.
GOODS SPECIFICS
- Date of issue: July 10, 2023
- Page count, weight, size: 228 pages | 412g | 152*225*15mm
- ISBN13: 9791187113614
- ISBN10: 1187113611
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