Opening remarks: 5 for those of you who probably have too many thoughts.
Before we start in earnest, 11

Part 1 He came to ruin your life
Chapter 1: The Man Who Throws Weeds While Wearing a Mask 32
The Same Profile 32 / The Two-Faced Psychomanipulator 41 / Four Strands of Grass Are Enough 46
Chapter 2: Remember the Three Doors and the Three Keys 71
The Three Keys to Psychological Manipulation 71 / Three-Act Drama 85
Chapter 3: Psychological Manipulators: Who Are They? 91
A runny nose, a bad guy, a rascal? 92 / Thoughts summarized in three sentences 97 / Mental age determines everything 103 / Why psychological fossilization occurs 107 / Can they, too, reform? 113 / How to spot a psychological manipulator 120 / It's a secret, but I'm telling you 133

Part 2: Why Do Overthinkers Become Targets?
Chapter 4: Because of Innate Neurological Characteristics 139
Sensory hypersensitivity 139 / The branching tree of thought 147 / The need for cognitive closure that makes one impatient with waiting 149 / Abnormalities of higher-order executive functions 151
Chapter 5: People Who Are Overly Emotional 153
How to Understand the Purpose of Emotions 154 / When You Can Control the Emotional Storm 159 / When You Let Go of Excessive Empathy 177
Chapter 6: The Crazy Brain's Needs 181
The Brain That Needs Connection 181 / The Brain That Enjoys Complexity 186 / The Brain That Seeks Meaning 191 / The Brain That Feared the End of Relationships 194
Chapter 7: When Two Opposite Worlds Meet 200
A Serious Misunderstanding Called by a Projector 200 / Two Worlds, Two Territories, Two Maps 205 / Two Worlds That Surprisingly Fit Together 212

Part 3: The Truth Behind the Trap You 'Keep' Falling Into
Chapter 8: From the Role of Victim to the Role of Conspirator 227
Messages and Messengers 228 / The Lawyer Role 232 / The Pesky Angel Disease 233 / The Habit of Glorifying the Ugly 236 / The Bad Consequences of Being an Accomplice 239
Chapter 9: Intentional Amnesia to Ignore Reality 248
Positive Disintegration Theory 250 / Stepping Through the Stages of Conscious Awareness 252 / The Hidden Commands of Deified Parents 255 / People Who Are Both Protectors and Perpetrators 258 / The Highly Resilient Mentally Hyperactive 261
Chapter 10: Thoughts You Should Never Have 264
I can save that person 265 / It's okay if I don't receive as much as I give 266 / Because I had no choice back then 269 / I have to see his face and decide 270 / I'm tired of fighting now 271 / If I wait, he'll change 271 / If I hadn't acted like that 273 / If I'm honest, he'll understand 274 / That's my fate, after all 277

Part 4: What You Need Now Is 'Drawing a Line'
Chapter 11: Redrawing the Line to Make Your Case 281
A New Look at Myself 283 / Listening to Your Heart 286 / Defining Absolutely No-Gos and Inviolable Rights 287 / Learning to Be Rude and Inconsistent 291 / I Am Responsible for Myself 297
Chapter 12: Effective Techniques for Developing an Eye for People 299
Why It's So Hard to Say No to a Psychological Manipulator 301 / Simple, Yet Powerful Self-Assertion Tools 305 / Magical Words 308

Closing Remarks If You Can Recognize Them 314

The definitive psychological prescription by Christelle Petitcolin, the 200,000-copy bestseller "I Think Too Much."
“After reading this book, you will be able to spot a psychological manipulator from 100 meters away!”
I am slow to act because I 'think too much', but that person has 'excellent decision-making skills'.
I have a hard time dealing with strangers, but he becomes friends with everyone easily.
To me, who has been told, “You’re too sensitive, you’re weird,” he tells me, “You’re right, I feel the same way.”
This thought comes to my mind.
'Could that person and I be soulmates, a match made in heaven?'
But Christelle Petitcolin, a French psychotherapist and bestselling author who has studied "psychological manipulation" for 24 years, says:
"You need to be a bit more discerning. That guy's a two-faced psychological manipulator."
Christelle Petitcolin, author of "I Think Too Much," which gained great sympathy from readers by analyzing "people who think too much," has now returned to reveal the psychological mechanism by which people who think too much "keep falling for" psychological manipulators.
Petitcolin, who previously discussed the overthinker and the manipulator, later counseled people who repeatedly fell for the manipulator and discovered that there was a "close connection, a strange compatibility" between the two.

A significant number of people I counsel have, as soon as they are able to escape from a controlling relationship and live a normal life, they seem to have amnesia and immediately step into a new controlling relationship… … .
They completely forget about the person they met and the abuse they suffered, and approach another psychological manipulator, mistaking him for a humane and kind-hearted person.
From an outsider's perspective, it looks like he is digging a pit of fire with his own hands.
(…) Why can't we see the obvious, even when we examine only the facts and actions? Is it because we're too trusting? Too generous? Or is it because we have such a strong desire to be loved and useful? (Page 21)

Based on previous research and counseling cases, the author discusses the complementarity he discovered between the behavior of psychological manipulators and the actively functioning brain.
Paradoxically, the faster a person's thinking is, the more susceptible they are to psychological manipulation.
Smart people want to understand others and consider their perspectives.
All misunderstandings can be resolved through dialogue, and I believe that because I treat people with good intentions, others will do the same.
But psychological manipulators lie, deny reality, and deliberately create conflict.
From the beginning, it is impossible to find a solution through dialogue with someone who is full of malicious intent.

If your life is going wrong for no reason, look around and see if there are people like this!
-Psychological Manipulator Diagnostic Checklist

□ “I will help you.”
He always says he'll make your wishes come true, but he never actually does.
□ “I think the same.”
After striking a chord, he later goes and says, “I never said anything like that.”
□ “If only it weren’t for him.” “It was all ruined because of that kid.”
As soon as he opens his mouth, he complains about his situation and blames others.
□ “Dr. Chuck Chuck has arrived?”
They don't hesitate to criticize and ridicule you, saying it's a joke.
□ “They say that smart people know how to do everything?”
When the results don't meet your expectations, you can fuel your frustration with these words:
□ “Actually, something came up at home.” “My boss is harassing me at work.”
The moment you try to point out the problem, you start to act like the most pitiful person in the world, like a victim.

□ “I cheated on you because you neglected me.”
If you point out an obvious mistake, they will shift the blame to you.
□ “I need you.”
The moment you try to refuse an unreasonable request, this phrase is thrown out and leaves you unable to move.

Why do 'overthinkers' easily fall into bad relationships?
-Two human types who are surprisingly compatible
A representative characteristic of people who think a lot is that their sensory system is more delicate and sensitively developed than that of ordinary people.
I am more sensitive to sounds and smells than other people, and I can't wear even a sweater that others wear because it makes me hot.
Their hypersensitive brains process all sensory information simultaneously and without pause.
It is because of this innate sense that we can hear the conversation next to us in a restaurant without having to eavesdrop.
But psychological manipulators are loud, smelly, break, ruin, and dirty.
Simply put, they hijack the 'sensory space' of the thinking person.
But people who have been told all their lives, “You’re too sensitive,” or “You’re too sensitive,” are often so used to the idea that there’s something wrong with them that they can’t tell their psychological manipulator to stop.

People born with hypersensitive senses cannot help but be sensitive.
Sensitive to mood, tone, pronunciation, ridicule, cynicism, and insinuation.
That's what you have to deal with every day.
Psychological manipulators play on their victims' hypersensitivity.
It's so easy to shake you up.
I find it hilarious how you seem to be at a loss! Like a bull in a bullring, you emotionally charge at the red cloth waved by a psychological manipulator! - Page 144

The second characteristic of a thinker is that he or she constantly strives to connect the ideas that arise and to organize them into a coherent whole.
The creativity and originality that emerges at this time is the charm of the mentally hyperactive person.
But the psychological manipulator finds it amusing to mess with the mind.
I enjoy watching thinking people get confused by being filled with unclear, contradictory, and misinformation.
The third characteristic is the ‘need for cognitive closure.’
People who think a lot cannot stand being incomplete or waiting.
In other words, I absolutely hate situations where I thought I had finished something, but then had to start over from the beginning.
But the psychological manipulator spouts ambiguous words that are difficult to interpret, and makes you wait all the time even though he knows you hate waiting.
Psychological manipulators know exactly what makes a person think a lot and know how to exploit it.
A psychological manipulator's specialty is finding people who think too much and using them to their advantage.
This is how a strange compatibility and surprising complementarity are completed.

Mental stealer, energy vampire, sociopath, narcissistic pervert, psychological manipulator
All people are the same, only their intelligence is different.
So who are these "psychological manipulators"? What kind of people are they that seek to exploit others? Petitcolin uses the terms "snot-nosed, rascals, and rascals" to describe these psychological manipulators.
The author takes a completely different stance from the conventional view that highly intelligent people are vicious and calculating.
Of course, psychological manipulators have a fair amount of narcissism, paranoia, hatred, sinister intentions, and malice, but they have the intelligence and simplicity of a child.
But how can they exploit intelligent, hyperactive individuals? The reason these psychological manipulators operate so freely is because we don't know them well enough and, therefore, leave them alone.

I see a psychological manipulator as a human being who has the appearance, responsibilities, life, and license of an adult, but who (unfortunately) is stuck at some point in his mental development where he has not yet fully grown and is permanently stuck in that state.
You may be tempted by appearances and think you're dealing with adults, but inside you're a child of eight or nine (though there may be a difference of one or two years), a foolish, naughty, stubborn, and spoiled child at that. - Page 93

Psychological manipulators are people who have experienced difficult situations in childhood and have shut down their thoughts to survive.
The pain is so intense that we feel no self-awareness, no sadness, no empathy, and no joy in life.
Bitter experience taught me that being 'bad-tempered' is a sign of strength, and being 'kind' is a sign of weakness.
Why wasn't there at least one kid in every class who bullied the young, smart, weak, and friendless kid in the playground or bathroom corner?
That kid is a mind manipulator.
Even though they grew up and acted like adults, their mentality and behavior did not change.
The terms 'mental stealer, energy vampire, sociopath, and narcissistic pervert', which we commonly use to refer to people who exploit others in a vicious manner, are also other names for psychological manipulators.
The only difference is their 'mental age', which can be distinguished based on the age at which their mental growth stops.
In the case of psychological manipulators, the maximum mental age is twelve years old.
Children can overcome a critical juncture and complete growth after turning 12, but psychological manipulators have not been able to overcome that wall.

The psychological manipulator holds three keys.
Coming to ruin your life
The mechanism of psychological manipulation can be summarized in three keys: doubt, fear, and guilt.
Once you unlock the overthinker's mind with these three keys, the rest is a piece of cake.
Psychological manipulators plant the seeds of 'doubt' in overthinking people.
Since a mentally hyperactive person is originally a person who is not easily convinced, the game is over if he or she scatters the three-piece set of 'surprised expression', 'denial of reality' such as 'I've never heard of such a thing', and 'opposing argument' such as 'you are wrong', and then jumps up and grabs it.
Their method is to gradually weaken the other person's convictions by shaking them with doubts.
It is easier to create the second key, 'fear'.
People who think a lot have so many fears that they seem irrational.
We are constantly afraid of hurting others, offending others, causing conflict, alienating others, being rejected, not being understood, or even being made fun of or criticized.


People who think too much have an overflowing imagination.
Even if I told you that you have a talent for filmmaking, and that you could make a disaster movie out of anything, it wouldn't be useful information.
There was a joke going around in the Zebra Internet Cafe for a while that only the mentally hyperactive could understand.
“When I’m on the phone and the person I’m talking to doesn’t say anything, I’d rather think they’re dead.
“I’d rather have that as a relief.” If you rely on this trait to play on your fears and let yourself create the worst-case scenario, it’s game over.
-Page 78

The final key is to foster a sense of 'guilt'.
Psychological manipulators are not responsible for everything.
No matter what happens, it's always someone else's fault.
But people who think a lot feel like they are responsible for things that have nothing to do with them.
These three keys form a self-reinforcing cycle.
When the first key is activated, it calls up the second key, which in turn calls up the third key, which in turn calls up the first key, and so on.
Because of this mechanism, once you fall into a psychological trap, you end up spinning around in it like a hamster on a wheel.
If this psychological manipulator is a friend or boss, it's all the better, but if it's a husband, wife, or family member, your life will be ruined as your connections are lost, your daily life is destroyed, and you may even suffer financial losses.

After developing an 'eye for people',
You can never fall into the same trap again!
So, does this mean overthinkers can never escape the clutches of psychological manipulators? Is this an inevitable consequence of the remarkable complementarity between the two? Petitcolin advises that since psychological manipulators never change, overthinkers should cultivate their "eyes for people" and change.
When you do that, I'm sure you can see the psychological manipulator approaching you from 100 meters away while digging a trap.
It's a painful truth, but the very nature of overthinking makes them both victims of psychological manipulation and "accomplices" in helping the psychological manipulators.
When we act as 'lawyers' by exercising 'compassion' and believing that there must be a reason for the actions of psychological manipulators, when we fall into the 'annoying angel disease' of having to forgive them, when we cover up their incompetence and do what they cannot do, the thoughtful person becomes an 'accomplice'.

Anyone who helps a villain and provides him with the means, excuses, alibis, and protection deserves to be called an 'accomplice'.
So, this is the result of your kindness, your unwillingness to acknowledge malice, your desire to live in harmony, your belief that everyone has a good side, your desire to be helpful and useful to others, and ultimately, your conviction that love can transform others.
'Poor psychological manipulators' are such bad people because they lack love, so if only they could receive enough love...
Ultimately, you are defending their cause and amplifying their destructive power. - Main text, pp. 239-240

Petitcolin says that to avoid falling into the trap of a psychological manipulator, you must first listen to the 'voice of your heart.'
In other words, you should trust your ‘intuition’ rather than your ‘thoughts’.
Second, we must establish an inviolable right that must not be crossed no matter what happens.
Third, you must learn to be rude and inconsistent.
This is the thing that people who think a lot have the most difficulty with.
For someone who has lived his whole life by the principles of politeness and sincerity, such advice is nothing short of punishment.
However, common sense and courtesy cannot possibly apply to arrogant people, so we must treat them the same way.

The methods the author presents are sometimes exhilarating, but at other times they are painful enough to feel like a 'bone-crushing' blow.
It's so detailed that you wonder if it's really necessary to go this far.
However, the damage caused by psychological manipulators is enormous in scope and scale, including mental, physical, and financial damage.
Considering that, the amount of effort a thinking person has to put in is laughable.
Moreover, it can also help you develop an eye for people, so wouldn’t it be killing two birds with one stone?