“Words become seeds,
“The fruit of life grows from that seed!”

The Art of Conversation, a masterpiece on relationships by bestselling author Kim Beom-jun, sold 300,000 copies.

Author Beomjun Kim, a conversation expert who has changed the lives of 300,000 readers, presents a method to change relationships and the flow of life with a single word.
Everyone wants to connect and empathize with others through conversation, but in reality, the results are often different from what we expected.
It's common to want to feel "happy" and "good to be together" through conversation, rather than "uncomfortable," "scared," or "honestly, I'm better alone." However, there are many cases where a single slip of the tongue can destroy a relationship that has been built up over a long period of time or make it impossible to approach the other person any further.
How can we communicate effectively to reach the person we want? How can we rebuild a broken relationship? How can we maintain the right distance in a relationship? The author suggests that the solution lies in "pretty words."
This book contains methods for finding and using the 'pretty words' that best suit the situation.

Our children, who were kind, warm, honest, and beautiful, unfortunately become distant from pretty words as they go through competition and enter society.
We learn bad words, strange words, and we use them to ruin our own emotions.
The result may be what we are today.
But in times like these, perhaps we should reconsider what we mean by "beautiful" words and strive to become adults who know how to say good, decent words. Before approaching someone, meeting them, or forming new relationships, I hope we can reflect on what we're saying and whether we're using kind words appropriately.
---From "Preface: A person who speaks so beautifully"

I hope that the first step to restoring a relationship by approaching someone is found in a single 'nice word'.
I hope you'll explore and put into practice various ways to make it easier to meet people through conversation.
You're not trying to navigate a world that's become a place where conversations are dictated by the past, are you? If you try to approach someone you've become accustomed to working apart from for long periods of time with the same old, unkind, or even offensive language, you'll only experience cold rejection, not acceptance.
---From "Prologue: People who know how to approach speak nicely"

Conversation goes wrong when we try to get something from the other person.
You can reduce mistakes when you start by knowing what kind of person the other person is.
So, before we start talking, please think about 'who on earth is this person?'
Focus on finding out what kind of person the other person is, and stop focusing solely on communicating by pouring out what you have to get something from the other person.

Please listen carefully.
And pay attention.
If possible, it's even better to go beyond mere interest and move to observation. What does it mean to "know how to communicate"? It doesn't necessarily mean knowing a lot about communication techniques.
To communicate effectively, you must begin by clearly understanding what you know about the person you are talking to.
That way, I can approach you and one day meet someone warmly.
---From "Words that Move Away, Words that Move Away"

A person becomes truly human only when he or she can communicate with himself or herself.
I need to realize who I am and what I do, and trust that, and it has to be me, not someone else.
This is why I need to get used to cheering for myself and rewarding myself.
Tell yourself, “I am a really good person.
When you can say, “Everything will be okay,” you gain the strength to take a step forward in the world.

But what do we look like? Aren't we repeating phrases like, "I'm going crazy," "I hate this," and "I'm sick of this."
They say that if you repeat something ten thousand times, it becomes a spell and becomes real.
Why are you saying irreversible evil things to yourself?
And that's not all.
There is a saying that people who easily discover their own weaknesses are also likely to become obsessed with discovering the weaknesses of others.
Is this how we can become people who approach others well?
---From "I can only be considerate of others if I can support myself first"

The trust that others have in us is sometimes built 'naturally' as work progresses, but there are also aspects that we have to design ourselves to some extent.
It's good to be humble, but that doesn't mean you should be wary of being condescending.
As Napoleon said, “Ability is useless without opportunity.” That’s right.
First, I have to create an opportunity, and that opportunity comes from my brilliance in expressing it appropriately.

Don't look shabby.
People who make fun of themselves are more likely to be made fun of by others.
It is not about valuing yourself in order to oppress and rule over others.
It's about valuing yourself in terms of self-care that helps you grow.
Speaking in a way that makes me feel valued closes the distance between me and the other person.
---From "Excessive humility makes you a fool"

Habits that have been ingrained in our mouths for decades are unlikely to suddenly disappear.
This is why speaking requires training.
Even if the environment is tough, you should practice being proactive rather than defensive.
If necessary, it's okay to encourage yourself with positive self-talk, a kind of hypnosis.
I once heard a pro golfer say this about his secret: “When I miss a tee shot and move to the next spot, I think, ‘The impact was weak.’
I never think, 'I should never make a mistake on the second shot.'
Rather, I think this way: 'The weather is nice and the scenery is nice.
right.
“Second shot, where do I send it? That’s the secret to my successful good shot.”
---From "Pretty Words That Help Me Grow"

To approach someone, you have to be selective about what you say and what you listen to.
I would like to call this a 'conversation of rest'.
It is difficult to expect quality conversation without pauses in conversation.
If you work without resting, there will be a loophole somewhere, and likewise, talking endlessly and listening endlessly to those words are both sacrificing your body and mind.

A heart of listening to the other person, an attitude of empathy and a desire to approach them, all are good.
But it would be difficult if it meant sacrificing one's soul.
Even conversations need breaks.
Rest is necessary for new beginnings, and so is conversation.
If you want to get better at what you're doing now, make sure you take some time for yourself during the conversation.
Because after a good rest, the words will reward us with good results.

---From "Conversations Need to Take a Break Sometimes"